Shake It Out
by SKINNYxLOVE
Summary: Narcissa and Lucius have been married for years now. They have yet to conceive a child. They're torn apart. The two are devastated, still madly in love. What will happen now? Will they move on or rekindle their love? Slightly AU; rating may go up.
1. Prologue

**SHAKE IT OUT**  
><em>By Mesteria<em>

**Author****'****s**** Note:** Surprise, surprise! I know… you haven't heard from me in a while. You probably thought I'd fallen off the face of the earth. Not quite. ;] University kind of killed my appetite for fanfic and I apologize. I've missed it, though, and I'm glad I got some muse back! I know it's a new story… I should be updating my other ones, but this is the story I have muse for right now. I hope you'll all enjoy it. =] I'd love reviews, but I won't beg for them because I'm a crap reviewer myself. =[ I'm sure you clicked on this link because, voila!, it's Lucius and Narcissa – what's not to love, hmm? They're frigging awesome. This story is slightly AU-ish, though; you've been forewarned. I still hope you like it. And you're all probably like 'SHUT UP ALREADY, WOMAN!'. So I will. Enjoy and thank you!

**Dedication:** This is for everyone who's stuck by me, throughout the years. Most importantly, it's for Rissy, Ace, Azzie and Lizzard.

**Thanks ****to:** Az for being my beta.

**Disclaimer:** These two little bunnies aren't mine, but they do give me a lot of inspiration. JK, are you sure I can't have them? xD Oh! And then title comes from the song ('Shake It Out') by Florence & the Machine! New CD comes out on Halloween! Now that's a treat. ;]

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><p><strong>PROLOGUE<strong>_  
>- January, 1978 -<em>

_To __make__ or__ keep __separate._ It was the only definition of divorce that kept repeating in Narcissa Malfoy's (soon to be Black) mind. None of the other definitions mattered. They didn't make sense, not in this situation. She was being forced away from Lucius. _Separated._ Forcibly separated. Surely there was a word for that? Sequester… no, not quite. Narcissa paced down the hallway, taking a moment to pause in front of an enchanted slab of glass that was meant to resemble a window. There were no windows in the Ministry, at least none that looked outside, for it was underground. Narcissa stared blankly at the window, watching the snow fall, arms folded over her chest. She was freezing. Instantly, Lucius crossed her mind. He couldn't wrap his arms around her frame, hold her close, kiss the top of her head and warm her to the core. Soon, they'd be separates, living their own lives once again.

"Narcissa, they're ready for us."

Breaking out of her thoughts, the young blonde witch turned her head to the side to stare at her barrister. She stood still, no thoughts coming to mind… only dread. After what seemed like ten minutes, Narcissa finally turned and headed down to where the barrister, Hector Vaisey, was standing. He didn't offer her any kind of comfort – no smile, no kind eyes, not even a pat on her back. Truthfully, Narcissa didn't mind. He looked as dead on the outside as she felt on the inside. She didn't want his sympathy or pity. She wanted to get this awful night over with and go… go wherever it was she was headed.

Hector opened the door and Narcissa stepped in before him, averting her gaze so she wouldn't have to look at Lucius. Not yet. Her heart was pounding in her ears and her stomach was flip-flopping. She thought she might break down, but she swallowed the pain instead. It settled deep in her middle, pain radiating throughout her whole body. Walking to a chair, Narcissa sat down and, for the first time that night, looked up. Her eyes immediately fell on Lucius. He was staring intently at her. He looked just as miserable as she thought she looked. His face was sad, pained and his eyes had circles under them. A deep frown was settled on his lips. Lucius then looked down at the table and Narcissa ached to be near him, to hold his hand. Slowly, she looked to Lucius' father, Abraxas. He was the cause of all of this. Couldn't he feel the heartbreak? If he did, he obviously didn't care.

"Narcissa?"

Blue eyes broke away from Abraxas Malfoy's face to the other barrister, representing Lucius. "Yes?" she croaked out dryly. She tried again, after taking a shaky sip of water. "Yes?"

"Have you had a chance to look over the new provisions?" the barrister asked. Narcissa wasn't sure what his name was, but she thought he looked like a Maxwell.

"I wouldn't be here if I hadn't," she replied in a clipped tone. She heard Abraxas snort and clear his throat quickly. She glanced at him, expressionless. The father-in-law who'd adored her since the minute she was born, who practically pushed his son and her together, who was now ordering a divorce between the young couple because it'd been four years and she hadn't had a child yet. Because the Healers told her she couldn't have children. So now he was taking away her happiness, her _life_. Narcissa didn't know what to feel now when it came to Abraxas. Anger at first, then hurt and now… she felt nothing, especially not loyalty.

The barrister, whose name might be Maxwell, nodded and stared at her for a moment longer before speaking. "If you're satisfied with the arrangements, then you ought to sign the papers," he advised very businessman-like.

The provisions he spoke about were the terms of the divorce. Divorces were uncommon in the wizarding world and nearly unheard of amongst purebloods. They'd attempted to keep quiet about this divorce, because it was so high-profile. But the wizarding world was small and word got around. Maybe it was that reason why Narcissa was getting anything out of the divorce. But she liked to think it was because Lucius wouldn't let her go with nothing. They were in love; she knew they always would be. The two main terms of the divorce, the only ones Narcissa was concerned about were:

"_A) The Malfoy family must provide Narcissa Black with an apartment or house of her choosing, wherever she pleases, until she remarries;_

_B) The Malfoy family must provide Narcissa Black with enough funds for her to pay necessitates and have extra for emergencies, despite the Black family's income, until she remarries."_

She looked again to Lucius, who was staring at her again with the same pitiful look as before. Narcissa's throat went tight and she had to force herself to look down at the stack of papers on the table to keep herself from crying. "I'm satisfied," she muttered. It was a lie and the entire room knew that. Hector pointed out the sections that required her signature or initials. Narcissa hesitated at the last page. One signature missing and they couldn't get a divorce. But Abraxas had made it quite clear that he would have his way and he'd use the Imperius curse if need be. Glancing up, Narcissa's eyes met Lucius' grey ones. He mouthed 'I'm sorry'. She knew he meant it; after all, this hadn't been his decision. Gulping air, she held it in her mouth and signed her name one last time. It was final. They were no longer married. No longer husband and wife. They were Lucius Malfoy and Narcissa Black, star-crossed lovers.

Sitting back in the chair, Narcissa let out the breath and looked to Hector. Her face must have given away her thoughts because the next thing she knew, everyone had left the cold room. Everyone except Lucius. She looked at him now, not afraid to cry (he'd seen it a myriad of times before.) Her eyes pooled as Lucius made his way towards her. She stood up and fell into his outstretched arms. They stood there, holding one another, savoring the last few minutes they'd have together. Narcissa eventually pulled her head from his chest and looked up at him.

"Don't forget me," she whispered.

Lucius shook his head. "Never," he whispered back. And slowly his head lowered until their lips were touching. The kiss was bittersweet and salty. When they pulled apart, Narcissa buried her face into his chest once more. He dropped his head on top of hers and whispered, "I love you. I will _always_ love you."


	2. Chapitre Un

**A/N:** Here's the first chapter finally! Thanks for Az for being my beta. And thanks to all of YOU to reviewed the prologue. It means so much.

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><p><strong><span>CHAPITRE UN: THINK OF ME<span>**

_- January, 1979 -_

It was the first of the year and it was anything but happy. Narcissa sat at the table in the sunroom, one leg pulled up to her chest with her chin resting on it. She was staring down at The Daily Prophet, wishing she'd ended her subscription after the divorce one year ago. Last night, she'd gone to a party and had far too much to drink. She'd fallen into bed with a dark-haired fellow, only to start crying as his hands roamed her body because his 'touch wasn't right'. Needless to say, the man had given her a strange look and then taken off, leaving her alone to think of Lucius. Once Narcissa had managed to pull herself and from the bed, she'd walked back out to the party and drank until someone (Regulus, if she could recall correctly) brought her home and deposited her into her bed. Now, only a few hours later, the Prophet was mocking her.

"_Wedding Bells Are Ringing!_

_Lucius Malfoy announced yesterday that there is a new Mrs. Malfoy on the way: Jemima Selwyn. The bride-to-be was a classmate of Mr. Malfoy's previous wife, Narcissa Black. She's young and beautiful and is 'very happy' to be engaged to the prestigious Ministry official. As anyone could tell while in their presence, the couple is obviously madly in love—"_

There was a knock on the door, calling Narcissa's attention. She'd read the article about seven times before; she didn't know why she kept doing it. It was torture, but at least she could read it now without crying. With a heavy sigh, Narcissa pushed herself away from the table, standing still as vertigo took over for a moment, and then headed for the door. Her blonde hair had grown long and she braided it most days, letting it fall over her shoulder. That's how it was now. She didn't care about her appearance as she pulled open the door, squinting because of the sun and the glistening snow.

"Did you see the Prophet this morning?" Bellatrix asked eagerly, her eyes shining. She'd never liked Lucius.

"If that's what you're here to talk about," Narcissa started off, turning away and walking into the small cottage, "then leave." She shot her sister a warning look over her shoulder, walking into the family room that was across the way from the kitchen. The cottage wasn't so bad. Narcissa did what she could to make it feel like a home.

"Cissy, you need to get over him," Bellatrix said, closing the door. She followed her sister into the family room, standing there wrapped in winter robes, clutching the Prophet with one hand.

"And you need to keep your legs shut," Narcissa snapped, meeting her sister's gaze. Her jaw was set, bracing herself for a fight. She wouldn't be told what to do (whom to love) in her own home.

Bellatrix's lips turned up into a cruel smile. She laughed, the sound echoing around the room, taunting Narcissa. "Jealous?" she asked, sinking into an oversized armchair. She crossed her legs, staring at her younger sister with one arched brow.

"Hardly," Narcissa scoffed, rolling her eyes halfway. She dragged her legs up onto the sofa and propped her elbow on the armrest to hold up her head. She stared at her sister and eventually shook her head. "I don't understand. You're _married_; what's the purpose of sleeping with other men?"

Bellatrix was silent, for the first time thinking about her answer. But all she offered was a shrug and a brief explanation. "You'll understand one day, once you've married again. I don't love Rodolphus—"

"I love Lucius," Narcissa interrupted, her voice firm.

"You can't have him, Narcissa," Bellatrix said irritably, her tone indicating that it was the end of the discussion. She was exasperated with her sister's persistence and wallowing.

Narcissa was quiet, flicking her eyes down to glance at a magazine on the table. She knew that she couldn't have Lucius, that that part of her life was over. But it didn't make the pain any duller. She knew she had to move on, for the sake of everyone around her, including herself. Narcissa didn't say anything; she merely fiddled with her hands in her lap, staring down at them. A moment later, Bellatrix was seated beside her on the sofa, one arm wrapping around her younger sister's shoulders tentatively. The blonde leaned into her older sister and felt a light kiss being dropped on her head.

"It's been a year," Bellatrix said softly. It wasn't typical of the elder sister to show affection; it got less and less the older she got. But Narcissa took it when she could. She looked up, staring into her sister's dark eyes. "He hasn't even bothered to contact you—"

"I know, Bella," Narcissa replied coolly. She didn't want to be reminded of that fact. He'd said he'd always love her, though… hadn't he meant it? She'd believed him with all her heart and first days passed with no contact, then weeks, then months and now it was almost a year to the date. No Lucius for a year. No soft kisses in the morning, no holding hands, no dancing, no sharing dessert…. Instead, she woke up next to men, recalling the sloppy sex from the night before. No one could compare to Lucius.

Next to her, Bellatrix readjusted herself, dropping her arm. "Are you going to the New Year's Party at Mum and Dad's manor?" she asked, standing up and looking down at her sister.

Narcissa looked up and nodded. "Yes, I'll be there."

Bellatrix smiled. "See you then, Cissy." She turned on her heel and headed out of the cottage. The door clicked behind her, signaling that she'd closed it, and Narcissa remained on the couch for another minute, cursing the silence.

_**oooOOOooo**_

Godric's Hollow was a small village where everyone knew each other. Narcissa had picked it because it was far away from everything familiar and was not an outskirt of a muggle village. The Malfoys had been surprised when she'd told them where she would be living and Abraxas had made some snide remark or other. It wasn't ideal, then again neither was the situation, and Narcissa had wanted a fresh start. That's exactly what she got. She lived next door to an older woman who took the time to make conversation and didn't seem to hold the divorce against Narcissa as some people did (many other purebloods). The lady, whose name was Poppy, was a widow. She had three grown children and five grandchildren, all ranging in ages from two to ten. Narcissa had met them a handful of times and was always a little jealous. For the most part, though, living in Godric's Hollow wasn't so bad.

Narcissa sighed as she made her way back to her cottage. It was a frigid, windy day and if she hadn't run out of mascara, she wouldn't even have been outside. Her scarf was wrapped around her neck, so it was just her face that was cold. She hurried back, being careful not to slip on the slick snow. As Narcissa approached her cottage, she stopped short. There was someone outside, standing on the stairs that led to the door. Not just _someone_. Lucius. After all this time. She stood in the street, staring at the man before her. He turned around at that moment, looking defeated, until his eyes found her. Even from where she stood yards away, Narcissa could see the hope in his eyes. They stared at each other for a moment before a group of rowdy teenagers on holiday bumped into the blonde witch by accident. She tripped forward, catching herself in time, and threw them a dirty look.

"Sorry, ma'am!" the pack leader called out as he and his friends galloped down the lane, laughing and messing around.

Taking a deep breath (the cold air stinging her lungs), Narcissa continued towards her cottage. She opened the gate and walked up to the stairs. She didn't ascend them, though; instead she stayed on the ground, staring up at Lucius. "What are you doing here?" she asked. It came out more harshly than she'd expected.

"I need to talk to you—"

"I saw the article," Narcissa cut him off coldly, no sympathy showing on her face. She didn't know what had come over her; she thought that, the moment she saw Lucius, she'd run into his arms and forget about everything. But her mind seemed to know better than her heart in his case.

Lucius stared down at her. His long hair was braided and resting against his back. His dress shoes were covered in snow. His face was red, obviously from the wind and the cold. His hands were shoved deep into the pockets of his coat. Narcissa thought he looked pitiful. But she'd rather stand out in the cold for hours before letting him into the cottage.

"Narcissa, _please_," Lucius said hastily. "I want to talk to you. Can we go inside?"

"No," she replied automatically. "This is my house and I'll decide who is allowed in and who isn't."

It might have been a twitch, but Narcissa could have sworn she'd seen the start of a smirk. "Your house that _I'm _paying for."

Instantly, Narcissa started to shake her head. Her hair, which was curled at the moment, bounced to and fro. "You're not really going to be that way with me, are you?" she asked, obviously taken aback. Lucius Malfoy played that card with everyone else, but he'd never gone down that route with her. It was irksome that he was doing it now. But staring up at him, Narcissa knew that he wasn't going to back down. She worked her jaw. "Move out of the way," she ordered.

Lucius smiled and stepped down from the stairs. Before he could even purposefully brush up against her, Narcissa was at the top of the stairs. She was going to unlock the door, slip inside and then slam the door in his face. He could camp out in her front garden all winter; she wasn't going to let him in her sanctuary. Maybe if he'd come months after their divorce, things would be different. But he'd made his choice and she wasn't it; he didn't deserve her time.

_Maybe Bella's talk today helped, _Narcissa thought as she pulled out her wand and pointed it at the doorknob. "_Effringo_," she whispered. Once she heard the click, Narcissa quickly pushed the door open and walked inside. She attempted to close the door just as quickly, but Lucius was already there and, as much as she hated it, he was stronger than she was.

"Nice try," Lucius said as he stepped into the warm cottage, closing the door.

Narcissa threw a glare his way. "Piss off."

"Narcissa, please—"

Lucius' hand was on her arm now, grasping it gently. Narcissa yanked her arm free and shrugged off her jacket, hanging it up neatly on the coat rack. She turned to face her ex-husband now, one hand on her hip. She stared blankly at him. "I'm not getting you anything to drink or eat," she informed him haughtily, as if implying that he was beneath her. "You can get it yourself. I need to finish getting ready. By the way, your timing is impeccable," she added sarcastically. She needed to be gone five minutes ago.

"Where are you going?" Lucius asked, following her down the hallway.

Narcissa glanced over her shoulder, her grip tightening on the mascara in her hand. She walked into the bedroom and headed into the adjoining bathroom. The cottage had two bedrooms and two bathrooms. She was aware of Lucius behind her the entire time. "My parents are having a party," Narcissa finally said in a somewhat regular tone as she stopped at the counter in the bathroom. She could see Lucius through the mirror, leaning against the doorframe. She uncapped the new mascara and leaned forward, beginning to apply it. "What is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

Lucius shifted against the doorframe and she knew he was feeling uncomfortable. She paused and met his eyes as they gazed at one another through the mirror. Narcissa gave him an encouraging smile and then started working on her lashes again.

"I don't love her," Lucius blurted. Narcissa paused briefly at this, wondering what in the world she was supposed to say. Thankfully, he kept on talking. "But, I… I needed to find _someone_. She's the most tolerable out of the others I've gone out with. None of them compare to you, though."

It didn't take the blonde long to finish with her eyes. She put the new mascara away silently, trying to think of something to say, and then grabbed her perfume. She rubbed some on her wrists and her neck, checked her hair and then turned around to face Lucius. "I don't know what you want me to say," Narcissa admitted cautiously. He stood there awkwardly, probably wishing he'd never come at all. Swallowing, she gripped the counter with her hands as she leaned against it. "D'you… do you love _me_?" Her voice was soft, careful.

Lucius nodded almost instantly. He took a few steps towards his ex-wife, trying to gauge if he could creep closer. When Narcissa made no attempt to ward him off, he finally stepped right up to her and placed his hands on her hips. "I do love you," he whispered, resting his forehead on hers. Narcissa closed her eyes. "Very much."

"I miss you," she whispered back, feeling as though she were on the verge of tears. Narcissa opened her eyes just as Lucius pulled his face away. They stared at each other for a moment and she wished he would kiss her. Just feeling his hands on her hips was driving her half mad. Just one kiss and the world might stop spinning. But the seconds ticked by and neither of them made a move. Finally, Narcissa sucked in her lips. She didn't want to leave, but she had to. "I need to go," she reminded him quietly.

"Right," Lucius said. He cleared his throat and stepped away from her. She slid by him and exited the bathroom. Her heels clicked along the hardwood floor as she made her way towards the front of the house, Lucius following her like a lost puppy. Narcissa grabbed her coat and pulled it on. She dared to look at her ex-husband again. He looked sheepish as he made his way towards the door. "I'll… I'll see you around."

Narcissa nodded, doing her best not to cry. She didn't respond. She watched him walk out of her life for the second time and her heart sank. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She held it for as long as she could before letting it spill from her lungs. Her eyes watered and Narcissa tipped her head back to stare at the ceiling so the tears wouldn't fall. When she finally got a grasp of herself, she walked outside as well, almost hoping Lucius would be there to surprise her. He wasn't. She disapparated; she could hear a bottle of wine calling her name.


	3. Chapitre Deux

A/N: *takes a deep breath*

I'm back?

I'm so sorry it's been forever since I've last updated this story! As the update said, I was having computer issues. They got fixed about a month ago, and I've just been slacking. But the story shall continue!

I must give a big thanks to Az, for being my beta through it all. She's amazing. And I also want to thank all of you who've stuck by my side. It means so much. The chapter takes a surprising twist at the end. IT WAS NOT PLANNED. I was writing, and it just happened. The title of the chapter is from the song "Change (In The House of Flies)" by Deftones. (Thanks for Az for the title idea!)

PLEASE REVIEW!

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE DEUX: CHANGE<strong>

The party was well under way by the time Narcissa walked through the front door. There weren't many people hanging about the foyer – just a married man and his mistress snogging, but they quickly parted ways when they heard the door close. The blonde smirked to herself as she made her way towards the loud voices in the dining hall. As she drew nearer, more and more people were scattered about the corridors, drinking champagne and whispering to one another. Narcissa smiled politely at each of them, even if they didn't look at her; it was her mother's house, after all, and she still needed to represent her parents. As she came to the double-door entryway, the blonde almost collided with someone else.

"Narcissa!" Druella Black hissed, though it was obvious to her daughter it was because she was more startled than angry. To cover this, the older witch narrowed her eyes. "Watch where you're stepping. It's about time you got here!" she continued, grabbing her daughter's arm and hauling her off back down the corridor. "Where have you been?"

"I was getting ready, Mother," Narcissa said, somewhat defensively, as she matched her mother's pace. She wriggled her arm, wincing as her mother's nails went further into her skin. She wondered if she should tell her mother about Lucius' surprise visit. "Did you want me to show up in my nightclothes?"

Druella cast her daughter a warning look. She may be twenty-three and may have been married and divorced, but she was still a _daughter_. "I expect that tone from Bellatrix; not you, Narcissa," she told her youngest.

"I'm sorry, Mother," Narcissa mumbled sheepishly. Reprimanded at twenty-three for her tone, of all things; _honestly_? "Where are you taking me?"

It was revealed a few moments later, as Druella stopped in the doorway of the sitting room. Glancing around, Narcissa saw some people she knew – mainly older men, who had worked with her father at the Ministry, or were fathers of boys she knew. One man – a young man – caught her attention, though. She walked into the room without another word to her mother.

"Reg," she said with a smile, as she approached her younger cousin. The dark-haired boy rose from his seat and met his cousin halfway, embracing her in a quick hug. "It's so nice to see you. How are you?" It wasn't any secret that Narcissa and Regulus had preferred each other's attention over the years. At first, it was because they were almost forced to spend time with each other – Sirius and Bellatrix and Andromeda wouldn't allow them to join their crowd. But, as the years went on, they developed a friendship that couldn't ever be replaced. Linking her arm through his, the blonde purposefully headed towards the exit, waiting for Regulus to divulge into a story or two, when she heard someone call her name. Stopping and turning around, Narcissa saw her father walking towards them.

"Father!" she said with a bright smile, advancing towards him. Upon reaching him, she couldn't help but to notice that he looked a little pale. Deciding not to comment on it, Narcissa pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"I'm pleased you could make it, darling," Cygnus Black said to his youngest. His arm wrapped around her waist protectively, pulling her close, and heading back towards Regulus. The older man lowered his head to whisper in his daughter's ear, "Look after your mother, will you? She's been a mess all day over this little get-together."

Narcissa laughed and nodded. "Of course," she said. "Endless pinot noir, I understand."

Cygnus smiled and the blonde thought she heard him make a low, throaty chuckling sound. They stopped in front of Regulus and Cygnus addressed his nephew. "Take good care of my little girl, Regulus."

Rolling her eyes, Narcissa slipped from her father's grasp and turned to face him. Part of her wondered why he'd say such a thing; they were only at a small party. It wasn't as if they were moving far away. The other part of her thought it was the brandy talking. Still, she gave her father a small smile.

"I wouldn't dream of doing otherwise, Uncle Cygnus," Regulus said firmly with a smile of his own. Cygnus reached out to pat his nephew on the shoulder, with an approving look, and then turned away from the two youngest Blacks. He slowly made his way towards the group of men he had left previously to speak with his daughter. Narcissa watched him walk away, worry tugging at her heart.

"He looks poorly, don't you think?" she asked Regulus, though her eyes were still trained on her father.

"Don't think about it, Cissy," Regulus replied, touching his cousin's upper arm and tugging on it gently. "Come on. Your mother's got these amazing hors d'oeuvre I've been dying to try." Forced to tear her eyes away from her father, Narcissa followed her cousin out of the room. She told herself to enjoy the party; it would most likely be the last one she was invited to for a while.

_**oooOOOooo**_

As it turned out, Narcissa drank most of the wine glasses filled with pinot noir that were meant for her mother. Not intentionally, of course. But she'd gone to get her mother another glass and, on the way back, someone had stopped her. This happened over and over, until the room began to spin and Narcissa found herself giggling at the most inappropriate times. Regulus, though – dear Regulus – came to her rescue. He escorted her out of the room, past an unamused Druella (and a snickering Bellatrix), and into the corridor. He took her to the stairs that led to the second floor, and carefully sat her down on them. Regulus sat next to her, looking at her with a smile.

"Don't," Narcissa warned her cousin darkly. She dropped her head into her hands, and a moment later felt Regulus' hand rubbing her back gently. "I just want to go home…"

"You know the rules. No drinking and disapparating." Regulus chuckled.

With a sigh, Narcissa closed her eyes and leaned her head against her cousin. Regulus wrapped an arm around his cousin's petite frame and held her close. It (losing Lucius) always hurt when she'd had too much to drink. But it hurt more today since the one-year anniversary of her divorce was coming up, and because of Lucius' surprise visit that morning. It didn't help matters that every bachelor at the party had chatted her up, either.

"Rookwood's been staring at you all night," Regulus said suddenly, as if reading Narcissa's mind.

The blonde looked up, and glanced down the corridor. Sure enough, Augustus Rookwood was nursing a scotch, mumbling some words to another man next to him, his eyes flicking down the corridor every now and then. At one moment, their eyes met and he gave Narcissa the faintest smile.

She turned to Regulus. "He's only interested in me because he couldn't have Bella, and he couldn't have… A-Andromeda," she said firmly, stumbling a bit as she spoke her disowned sister's name. Rookwood and Bella had dated very briefly, before he found out that she'd been cheating on him with Rodolphus Lestrange. He had been angry at first, but then he'd suddenly changed and pursued Andromeda. Of course, when that hadn't worked out, Narcissa had been expecting him to come after her. He hadn't, and everything had been forgotten. Until now, when it all came flooding back to the blonde.

Regulus nodded and seemed to hesitate. Narcissa jabbed him in the ribs gently with her elbow, giving him a look that said _tell me_. He frowned. "Everyone… the guys… they all say you're getting too old to marry," he said in hushed tones. "Especially for someone who can't have children…"

It hurt to hear; it was almost unbearable. But she'd be twenty-four soon and, yes, it appeared that she couldn't conceive children. No one would want her by the time she turned twenty-five. Her best option was to marry a widowed man, who had some grown (or growing) children. Even she knew this. But she chose not to think about it. So the fact that Augustus Rookwood, four years her senior, was interested in her, was saying a bit. Swallowing, Narcissa placed a hand on Regulus' shoulder and carefully pushed herself up. "I think I'll go lie down for a while," she said.

Regulus took his cousin's hand and kissed the top of it. He nodded. "Do you need me to walk you upstairs?" he asked gently.

Narcissa shook her head. "No, thank you." She glanced down the corridor again, only to find Rookwood staring at her. They locked gazes for at least half a minute before the blonde broke their connection by turning away and heading up the steps.

When Narcissa reached the top of the stairs, she rounded the banister and walked down to her old room. It was still kept tidy; the sheets were changed on a regular basis, the windows were open during the summer, it always smelled lovely. The blonde stepped into the room and closed the door halfway, breathing in deeply. Memories of her childhood came flooding into her mind and, if she closed her eyes, she could almost hear three young girls giggling and running down the hallway. Opening her eyes, Narcissa made her way towards the bed. She sat down and slipped out of her shoes before pulling her legs up onto the bed. She rolled over onto her side, and closed her eyes once again, hoping that sleep would come easy.

She wasn't sure how much time had passed before she heard the door creak open. Too tired and too depressed to turn over to see the intruder, Narcissa ignored it. Maybe they'd go away if she pretended to be sleeping. After a few moments, she still felt a presence in the room. At first, she thought it might be her mother. But she was getting an unsettling feeling from the person.

Something was off. Narcissa rolled over, only to see Augustus Rookwood standing by the door. The blonde sat up quickly, and tugged on the hem of her dress.

"Rookwood," Narcissa said, surprised. "What are you doing in here?"

The dark-haired man closed the door and advanced towards the bed. Narcissa watched him, her heart pounding. She scooted away from him when he sat down on the bed. He met her eyes. "I thought this was what you wanted," Rookwood said with feigned innocence.

"Thought I wanted what?"

"To be with me, right now." There was a pause and Rookwood leaned towards her. "You met my gaze minutes ago, just downstairs. Do you not remember? And then abruptly went up the stairs. I know hints when I see them, Narcissa."

Narcissa watched him as he spoke, studying his features. Her blue eyes darted all around his face. She didn't like what he was saying, what he was implying. She hadn't given him any hints – at least she hadn't thought so. Maybe it was the alcohol clouding her mind. She shook her head. "I'm sorry, Augustus," Narcissa said, planning her escape. She opened her mouth to continue, but Rookwood cut her off.

"At least one of you is capable of an apology," he sneered. It caused Narcissa to stop, remain frozen. He moved closer to her, but she couldn't move. "But I always get what I want, Narcissa. And I want one of you Black girls. Always have, always will."

"Rookwood, I – " And, again, she was cut short. But this time it was because Rookwood had lunged at her, pinning her between his body and the mattress. Narcissa's heart was pounding so loud, she was sure Rookwood could hear it. She struggled underneath his weight, trying to free herself. "Rookwood, get off! Get off of me!"

But it was a cruel face that stared back at hers. He chuckled darkly, his hand gliding down her frame. Panic was etched into every crevice of Narcissa's face. She told herself that he was only fooling around. He'd let her go in a couple of seconds. But his hand dared to stoop lower, to the hem of her dress. Narcissa's heart skipped a beat and she could feel tears building in her eyes. "Augustus, please," she begged, "stop. Stop it. Please don't do this."

Rookwood's mouth was close to Narcissa's ear. "Shh," he whispered in an oddly soothing voice. "Shh, Cissy. It's just me. No need to be afraid."

She was petrified, though. She still struggled against his hold, her blue eyes full of tears. She shook her head madly when she felt Rookwood's hand sneak under her dress and creep up again, until it was tugging at her stockings. "Please, don't," Narcissa whispered, letting the tears flow freely down her face. She was losing the battle – and where was her wand? This wasn't happening. It couldn't be. Not in her old home, in her childhood room. She stopped fighting him when his hand pulled her stockings down just far enough, and then crept up to pull her thong to the side.

She knew what was going to happen next.

_**oooOOOooo**_

The water was hot. Scalding hot.

It was just the way Narcissa wanted it. She wanted to burn off her skin.

Or maybe she could be like a butterfly. The shower was her cocoon and, once she was out, she'd be a new, beautiful creature.

It didn't matter that this was her third shower of the evening. The evening that still hadn't ended.

After Rookwood had left, Narcissa had collected herself and walked downstairs, poised as ever. She kissed her father on the cheek, and bid the rest of the family farewell. When she got to her small home, she locked the door and closed the curtains. Then she'd proceeded to the bathroom connected to her bedroom and…

Narcissa ducked her face into the stream of water. And she cried.


	4. Chapitre Trois

**a/n: **woohoo! another chapter. this chapter is the beginning of several subplots - see if you can spot them. ;] (though i won't tell you if you're right or wrong.) i'm very excited to continue on with this fic. ^^ all i ask is that you PLEASE PLEASE review. it's discouraging to get an e-mail that says so-and-so has put SIO on story alert, yet i have no review. it doesn't even have to be that much - even just ONE WORD. i'm actually a bit disappointed because i didn't get many reviews for the last chapter... so please, just drop a small line?

**disclaimer:** not mine.

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE TROIS: YOU'LL BE IN MY HEART<strong>

It had been three days since the… party. Narcissa had tried to get back to her regular life, but she just couldn't do it. For three days, the only time she changed out of her pajamas was when she took a bath. After that, she crawled back into bed and slept. Several people had tried to get in touch with her – her mother, Bellatrix, Regulus, Alecto Carrow, and Castalia Yaxley to name a few. But Narcissa had written them all back, explaining how she must have caught something from one of the guests at the party because she was feeling just dreadful. Much to her luck, everyone seemed to understand and stopped sending owls.

Lucius had seemed to vanish once more, and it upset Narcissa more than she liked to admit to herself. They had gone a year without speaking; had she expected, from his short visit, that they'd be chatting again on a daily basis and seeing more of each other? No, but she had been hoping. There was something in the air that day when Lucius visited her; there was still something between them. And he had even admitted it; he'd told her that he still loved her. That meant something; it had to. It was the only hope that she still had in the world, especially now. What if the rest of the men, the ones that were an option for her to marry, were like Rookwood? She didn't want that kind of life, that kind of marriage.

A loud knocking on the door brought Narcissa out of her thoughts. She stared at the ceiling for another moment, letting her visitor pound on the door some more, before sighing heavily and throwing back the covers. She grabbed her robe and wrapped it around her small frame, hoping that the person would be gone by the time she reached the door. But their knocking continued, and Narcissa was growing irritated. She flung open the door, a scowl set into her features, only to see her father standing before her.

"Father," Narcissa said, surprised. She stepped back and invited her father into the small house. She closed the door behind him and held her arms across her chest, as if she were exposed. "What… what brings you here?"

"Your mother said you were ill," Cygnus replied in his deep voice. He walked into the sitting room and Narcissa followed him.

"Oh, did she? I… I'm alright now. I think I'm over the worst of it." She sat down next to her father on the couch and gave him a reassuring smile. "You didn't have to come here to check on me."

Cygnus returned his daughter's smile. "I wanted to," he told her genuinely. He then averted his attention to their surroundings, taking in everything. "It's been some time since I was last here."

Narcissa nodded, never taking her eyes off of her father. She had a feeling that there was something on his mind. "It hasn't changed much," she said slowly. She studied his features, noticing that he still looked tired. She had thought before that it was because of the party. It was becoming clear to Narcissa that that wasn't the reason at all. She'd never seen him look so… old. "Father… is there something on your mind?"

It took a few seconds, but Cygnus eventually turned his head to the side to meet his daughter's gaze. Slowly, he nodded, and then reached for his youngest's hand. He grasped it just loosely enough so as not to crush her fingers, and just tightly enough so as to convey his support. "Augustus Rookwood came to me the other day," he started off in a very businesslike tone. Narcissa's heart skipped a beat, and then started beating rapidly. Her stomach flip-flopped, which caused her to feel nauseous. On the outside, she was as calm as ever. "He asked my permission to marry you."

And, suddenly, Narcissa's world came tumbling down. She should have seen it coming. She shouldn't have been so blind! Of course Rookwood would pull something like this. He had said that he'd wanted one of the Black girls. At the time, Narcissa had been daft enough to think that he'd only meant he wanted sex from one of them. Which he'd gotten, and she had assumed that he'd just disappear. But no… he had meant that, in addition to sex, he wanted to be married into the Black family. He could now have his wish come true. And it was all her fault.

"But, we're… and he… it's like-" Narcissa stammered, cutting herself off. Her tongue was tied; she couldn't form any coherent sentences. She stared at her father, fearing the worst as she managed to ask, "What did you say?" She closed her eyes, afraid to see the expression on his face.

There was a moment of silence and then Cygnus said very softly, "I told him I would think on it. But it's been my intention to talk to you about it straight from the beginning."

Narcissa's blue eyes fluttered open, and she gave her father a confused yet curious look. This wasn't how most marriage permission proposals went. Usually, whatever the father's decision was, was inarguable. She stared at Cygnus before she started to slowly shake her head. "No," Narcissa said, choking back a sob as everything came rushing at her. "Father, please. Please don't give him permission." She was unable to hold back her tears any longer. Three days of fear and anger came rolling out in round, salty tears. "I loathe Rookwood – no! No, I _hate_ him-"

"Narcissa," Cygnus said gently, giving her hand a squeeze. Her tear-filled blue eyes fell on his concerned brown ones, and the blonde couldn't stop herself. She flung her arms around her father's neck and clung desperately to him. Cygnus folded his arms around her frame, holding her closely. He ran a hand over Narcissa's long, blonde hair and kissed her temple. "Narcissa, there's no need to cry…"

Nodding, Narcissa pulled away from her father, letting go of his neck. She wiped at her eyes, and forced out a laugh. "I know," she said quickly, feeling daft. "I'm sorry." She avoided her father's gaze, and eventually settled her eyes on her hands in her lap.

"Don't be sorry, love," Cygnus spoke softly, reaching out to grab one of his daughter's hands. Narcissa looked up at him pitifully, defeated. "Is there something the matter?" Without meaning to, the blonde gripped her father's hand tightly, and slowly felt her head moving in an up and down motion – nodding. Cygnus's features softened, something Narcissa hadn't witnessed in years.

"Rookwood," she choked out. "It's about Rookwood. He… he r- I tried to stop him! He was too strong." And she was crying again.

Tentatively, Cygnus reached up and carefully held his daughter's face between his hands. "He did what, Narcissa?" he demanded gently, but urgently. The blonde's blue eyes bore into her father's dark ones, noticing that his eyebrows were furrowed. He was concerned.

Narcissa swallowed, trying to form the words in her mouth. But they were too harsh. It was such an ugly word. "He a-a-attacked me," she stammered, concentrating hard on the words that she was saying. "He f-forced me… to… heforcedhimselfonme," Narcissa finally said, the words running together.

The room went deadly quiet, and it was all Narcissa could do to keep herself from falling apart again. She was aware of Cygnus leaning towards her, and she closed her eyes. Narcissa buried her face into her father's chest, feeling secure for the first time in days. "He can't hurt you now," Cygnus whispered in his youngest's ear. It was a promise

_**oooOOOooo**_

Telling her father about the rape had made Narcissa feel better. She'd begged him to please keep it quiet and not tell a soul. If Cygnus had broken his promise, no one had come forward to tell the blonde. Thus, as far as she was concerned, he'd kept his word. Her father checked on her several times a day, through owls mostly. He also informed her that he'd denied Rookwood's suggested marriage proposal, and that the man hadn't been pleased. Narcissa had waited anxiously after receiving that owl, suspecting that the vile excuse for a man would show up on her doorstep. He hadn't, though it was still difficult for Narcissa to sleep at night. But she was slowly beginning to pick up the pieces of her life; she was better than this. She was better than him. She wouldn't let Rookwood control her life; she wouldn't let what had happened control her life.

Scurrying down the short hallway, Narcissa attempted to put on her shoes. Her plan was unsuccessful, though, and she skidded to a stop in front of the door where a knock had resounded just moments before. She smoothed out her skirt, swallowed hard and tentatively reached for the doorknob. Taking a deep breath, Narcissa turned the knob and opened the door. The face she saw was not the one she'd been expecting.

"Oh, it's you," she sighed, relieved. She opened the door wider and turned away from it, walking further into the small house.

"Don't sound so happy," Lucius said dryly, as he followed her into the house, closing the door.

Narcissa turned to face him, propping her hands on her hips. "Lucius, what do you want?" she asked, irritated. Why was he like this? He'd been unbearable since their divorce. Unbearable to think about, and now unbearable in person. But it wasn't Lucius she was upset with. No, Narcissa was angry with Abraxas. It was just that her ex-husband was the one who got the brunt of it because he apparently thought it was okay to keep coming around.

"Are you going somewhere?" he asked, his eyes travelling down her body. She was dressed as if she were heading out; high-waisted skirt that clung to her slim frame and a silk shirt tucked in nicely. He noted the shoes in her hands: high heels. She had always looked amazing in them.

Narcissa took the opportunity to slip into her shoes. "It's none of your business-"

"Why are you always going out when I'm here?" Lucius cut her off.

_Was he whining?_ He sounded like a child that wasn't getting their way! The blonde lifted her head, meeting his gaze, and replied evenly, "Why do you always show up unannounced?" Unannounced because he wasn't uninvited – he'd made that clear last time he'd stopped over. (And, really, as much as it pained her, she liked when he was here. For however brief a time it was.) Staring at him, Narcissa noticed just how lost he looked – and tired. He didn't look well; he looked far too stressed.

"Do you have a date?" he asked, accusingly.

The words hit Narcissa like a ton of bricks. She stared blankly at him before her expression transformed into something ugly: annoyance and disgust. That was certainly none of his business! "It shouldn't matter to you if I'm going out on a date," she said defensively. "Last time I checked, you were the one with a new fiance! Or have you forgotten about that slag that shares your bed now?" The audacity! It was okay for him to date – and get engaged! – but she couldn't? Oh, how he made her blood boil.

Lucius didn't answer right away; instead he stood there, looking miffed. His arms had folded across his chest in a defensive manner. "Jemima is not a slag, Narcissa," he replied (rather weakly) in a deep voice. The statement caused Narcissa to scoff. "And if you don't want me around, I reckon I'll be taking my leave-"

"Lucius," Narcissa said, exasperated, automatically reaching for his hand. He stopped and stared hopefully at her, his hand grasping hers back. "I'm meeting Talia for lunch… come by after supper, alright? Bring a bottle of wine." It was the least she could do, enjoying a bottle of wine with him. He was obviously trying to reconcile with her; she should try as well.

"Are you sure?" Lucius asked slowly, as if fearing that he might be pushing his luck by asking.

"Positive," Narcissa practically whispered, her anger melting away.

"Will you be around?" Narcissa almost went off on him, but then she spotted his familiar playful smirk. She smiled up at him. "Narcissa… I, I need my hand back." Heat rose in her cheeks, and she quickly dropped his hand. "I'll see you tonight."

"Tonight," Narcissa repeated with a nod.

_**oooOOOooo**_

The weather outside was not pleasant. It was mid-January; the wind was fierce and snow drifted off the roofs of buildings as Narcissa walked down the quiet Muggle street in London. She'd been so distracted when she had Disapparated, that she'd ended up four blocks away from her destination. (She was lucky she hadn't gotten splinched.) She could have Apparated again, but she didn't trust herself. So, in the cold and the snow and high heels, Narcissa made her way to the upscale wizarding restaurant that was nestled in the Muggle city. Finally, reaching her destination, she sighed happily. The door opened, and the young man who had let her in gave her a smile.

"Good afternoon, ma'am," he said as Narcissa stepped through the entrance to the building. She flashed him a friendly smile and stepped up to the hostess, stating that she was meeting a friend. Instantly, the hostess seemed to know who the blonde was meeting, and headed off towards Castalia.

"Sorry I'm late," Narcissa apologized instantly when she'd reached her friend. She bent down to kiss Talia on the cheek before taking her seat across from the other girl. Sitting across from her friend, Narcissa was able to observe her. She noticed straight away that Talia looked very tired, and like something was weighing on her mind. Her blonde curls were dull and nearly lifeless; there didn't appear to be any product in them, or any charm, to keep them from just hanging there. Her hazel eyes lacked any sparkle. "Talia… are you alright?"

Castalia was struggling with her answer, Narcissa was sure of it. It took a few moments, but eventually the other blonde shook her head. She reached for her glass of water and picked it up. Her hand was shaking so badly, however, that the clear liquid sloshed over the sides of the crystal glass and spilled all over Castalia's bony hand.

"Hey… hey," Narcissa said softly, reaching out to take the glass. She handed her longtime friend a cloth napkin to dry off her hand. She stared at her, concerned. "Tell me what happened. What's got you so nervous?"

Castalia gave her friend a wary smile and attempted to pick up the glass of water once more. This time, she didn't spill it all over the place. She took a few small sips before placing it back down and smoothing out the tablecloth. Narcissa waited patiently. She knew about Castalia's marriage to Yaxley; it had been arranged, and he was a terrible man to be married to. On more than one occasion, Narcissa had seen the bruises and the cuts (from his rings, Talia had always said) and the girl had even had her ribs broken before. She'd gone from a girl who laughed loudly, flirted shamelessly and gossiped too much with Narcissa in Potions class, to a quiet, subdued woman who was constantly looking over her shoulder.

"I'm pregnant," Castalia eventually managed to croak out, glancing around as if Drusus Yaxley would be right there, listening to everything they were saying. Narcissa opened her mouth, but the other blonde held up her hand and shook her head. She seemed to be trying to keep herself from crying as her other hand gripped the edge of the table. "Dru… Dru isn't the father."

Narcissa stared at her friend, unsure how to move forward. She didn't know what questions to ask. Luckily, Castalia seemed to pick up on this and continued to speak.

"Edmund Greengrass is the father," she spoke softly, flicking her eyes down and then looking up at Narcissa from under her lashes.

Silence surrounded them as Narcissa took all of this information in. She wasn't judging her friend; she was merely trying to process everything that she'd been told thus far. "Are you positive?" she asked after a minute, her tone matching the quiet one of Castalia.

Solemnly, Castalia nodded. "Yes," she whispered. Narcissa thought she could see her friend shaking, but she wasn't sure. "Dru hasn't… he has a mistress, you know? Possibly more than one. But, never mind that. We haven't had sex in… _months_. The only man I've been sleeping with is Eddie…" Castalia trailed off and then looked up at Narcissa, eyes full of worry. "Drusus will _kill_ me, Cissy."

"What about your parents; have you told them?" Narcissa asked, and regretted it a second later. They were the ones who'd agreed to let their only daughter marry a monster. They turned their heads at the abuse Castalia had to endure. "Or your brother? You know he won't let anything happen to you." Tristan Avery had always been protective of his sister, despite the fact that she was the eldest. He, too, had seen the bruises on her body, and had begged his parents to let Castalia leave Yaxley. No such luck, however.

"I haven't told Tristan yet," the other blonde admitted slowly. She smoothed invisible wrinkles in the tablecloth again before looking up at her friend with fearful eyes. "Cissy, Dru will cut this baby out of me. He's going to be so _angry_."

Narcissa shook her head, determined not to let anything happen to Castalia. "No, he won't," she said. "I'll be with you when you tell him. He wouldn't dare try anything in front of me. We'll get-" _Lucius_. The name died on her lips. She swallowed, but then forced a smile. "We'll get you out safe and sound, yeah? How far along are you?" she added.

Castalia seemed glad that Narcissa had steered the conversation away from Drusus Yaxley and his temper. For the first time in what seemed like years, the young mother-to-be smiled. Genuinely. "Five weeks," she said. "I'm due in September."

"That's so exciting," Narcissa replied, her own face glowing. She wasn't too terribly jealous; of course, she wanted a child. More than anything. But that didn't mean she was so clouded by envy that she couldn't be happy for her friend. She was ecstatic for Castalia (and a little nervous because of the situation in which the baby had been conceived). "Talia, you're going to be a fantastic mother. Congratulations."

Castalia smiled and reached across the table for her friend's hand. "So will you, Cissy, someday," she replied gently. Then she let out a laugh; something that Narcissa hadn't heard come from her friend's mouth in years. She couldn't help but laugh herself. It was as if they were sixteen again, and laughing at something so inappropriate, yet they couldn't care less. "We'll raise them together! Promise me?"

"I promise," Narcissa agreed with all of her heart, yearning for it to be true.


	5. Chapitre Quatre

**a/n: **yay for another update! my muse for this story just keeps coming... xD i'd like to thank everyone for reviewing. it really means a lot more than i can say. please keep them coming! also, i'd like to thank az for being my beta; she's amazing. speaking of amazing, she has her own lucissa i'd like to direct everyone to. it's called sentimental hearts and it can be found here: http : / / www . fanfiction . net /s/7633329/1/Sentimental_Hearts (take out the spaces in the beginning!)

the title of this story is from sugarland's 'stay'. also, i forgot to say in the last chapter that the chapter title ('you'll be in my heart') is from the movie tarzan, heh.

**disclaimer:** none of it is mine.

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE QUATRE: STAY<strong>

Lunch with Castalia went surprisingly well after she'd told Narcissa her news. They talked about baby things, mostly, and when the right time to tell Edmund and Drusus would be. Narcissa promised to be there both times; she would be damned if something bad were to happen to her best friend. She returned home about two hours later, only to remember that Lucius was coming over later that afternoon. She performed a few house-cleaning spells, and then rummaged through the cabinets to find something they could munch on. She found some crackers, some sweets and a few pastries, but none of them looked very appealing – and she wasn't sure how old they were. Hopefully Lucius would be smart enough to remember to bring something to eat – dessert, perhaps.

After lighting a few candles and turning on some music, Narcissa retreated to her bedroom to change for the evening. She couldn't help but to notice how nervous she felt, as if this were a date. It wasn't, she scolded herself. It was Lucius… with a bottle of wine. They'd had plenty of nights like this before. (Most of them usually ended in the bedroom.) But, no, they would be adults about this entire thing. They'd drink, they'd talk, Lucius would go home to Jemima and Narcissa would retire to bed alone. She told herself this for the rest of the afternoon.

When the familiar knock resounded, Narcissa's heart skipped a beat. She opened the door, a smile already planted on her face. There stood Lucius, handsome as ever, the moon shining on his pale skin and blonde hair. Narcissa invited him in and, plucking the bottle of wine from his hands, got some wine glasses from the small kitchen.

"I don't have anything to eat," she explained cautiously as she walked over to Lucius and handed him the glass.

Lucius looked around, as if expecting to see right through the cupboards, and then nodded. "I'll send Dobby out tomorrow to shop for you," he said, very businesslike. "He can clean for you as well…"

"Oh," Narcissa said quietly, glancing around. She'd been cleaning just hours earlier. "Lucius, I don't mind doing house-cleaning spells-"

"House-cleaning spells can only do so much," he interrupted, looking down at her. "He needs to do something while I'm gone, anyway."

"Gone?"

Lucius opened his mouth, but then closed it. He peered down curiously at his ex-wife. "Narcissa, has it been so long that you've forgotten I work in the Ministry?" He chuckled and sipped his wine.

Heat flooded her cheeks, but it vanished just as quickly as it had appeared. "I thought you meant – oh, never mind!" She laughed it off, and then stepped over to the living area. Hearing Lucius make a disgusted noise deep in his throat, she spun around quickly, narrowing her eyes. "What?"

Narcissa could see the hesitation in his face, but she willed him to speak his mind. She hated it when things went left unsaid between them. Lucius glanced around the small house once again before his blue-grey eyes met Narcissa's blue ones. "It's just… I'm pleased you inhabit a wizarding community," he started off slowly. "But don't you want to live in a bigger house? This is just so… _small_."

"I assure you," Narcissa began, "it's perfectly suitable for one person. It's not ideal for me, and I don't wish to spend the rest of my life here, but… but for now, it'll do." She collapsed onto the sofa.

Lucius crossed the room and sat down beside her, one arm flopping onto the armrest. "Are you sure?" he asked carefully.

_No._ "Yes," she said. Without thinking, Narcissa pulled her legs onto the sofa and cuddled up to Lucius' side. When she felt him stiffen, she realized what she'd done; but it was too late to go back now. So she pretended to have never felt his muscles tense at her touch, and sipped on her wine instead. It wasn't too terribly long before Lucius relaxed and an arm wrapped itself around Narcissa's shoulders. Just like when they were married.

"How was lunch with Talia?" he asked.

Narcissa hesitated, wondering if she should tell him the truth. Lucius and Yaxley weren't close at all, but something inside of the blonde advised her to keep her mouth shut. "It was very nice," she replied. It wasn't a total lie. "Did you have dinner with Jem?" Once upon a time, Jemima had been friends with Narcissa.

"I did."

"How was it?" she pushed.

There was silence and Narcissa craned her neck around to look up at her ex-husband. "It could have been better," Lucius admitted. "She could have been you…"

"Does she know you're here?" Narcissa asked softly, not dropping their gaze.

Lucius shook his head, and she felt her stomach sink. It was like they were sneaking around. Which was exactly what they were doing. But why? They'd been married; they shouldn't have to sneak around. They should be allowed to see each other without having to lie about it.

"I need some more wine," Narcissa said, untangling herself and jumping up from the sofa. Her glass wasn't even gone yet.

It only took two glasses of wine for Narcissa to feel loosened up. She wasn't drunk, and she wasn't even tipsy; she was feeling good. The edge had been taken off. In fact, the blonde felt so relaxed that she'd somehow managed to start a conversation about baby names.

"You would honestly name your daughter Balbina?" Narcissa asked incredulously. She laughed when Lucius nodded, looking almost embarrassed. "Lucius! What if she had a stammer? That would be just cruel! Poor doll…" She made a _tsk_ing noise.

"Well! What would _you_ name your daughter?" he countered, gulping down the rest of his wine.

Narcissa rocked back on her heels (she'd been kneeling on the sofa next to Lucius), and thought about the question seriously. The fact that she couldn't have children never crossed her mind. "I'd probably name her after a star," she said with a nod, her eyes meeting his. "Alcyone is nice… so is Meissa. Arista, Lyra are lovely, too… do you fancy any of those?"

Lucius smiled. "You wouldn't name her after a flower?" he asked, ignoring the question posed at him. Narcissa frowned, and he chuckled. "Do you know what my favorite flower is?" He reached out to finger the tips of her blonde hair, smirking at her.

"Yes." The word came out more tightly than she had intended it to. She stared at him, and he stared back. Minutes ticked by and, had she been sixteen and naive, she would have wondered why he hadn't kissed her yet. But she wasn't sixteen, she wasn't naive, and she knew Lucius Malfoy was not going to kiss her.

Clambering off of the sofa, Narcissa reached down for Lucius' hand. She felt something smooth on one of his fingers and she looked down at it. A gold band. His engagement ring. Not from their engagement, however; from the one with Jemima. Picking up his hand, Narcissa slid the ring from his finger. "Tonight," she said as she concentrated on working the smooth metal off of his digit, "you're all mine."

And the ring came off. Lucius never protested and Narcissa let the small object fall to the floor. She heard it roll away, but didn't bother looking down to see. Still no words left her ex-husband's mouth. She tugged on his arm, indicating that he should abandon his empty wine glass and get up. He did just that and Narcissa walked backwards, away from the sofa and into the middle of the room. She smiled at Lucius. He smiled back and, in one quick moment, his arm had made its way around her waist and was pushing her towards him. Narcissa knew what was happening before it even did. She closed her eyes and waited for their lips to crash together, feverishly moving in sync. It felt so surreal. Kissing Lucius after so long. She'd almost forgotten what a good kisser he was and how just his touch made her body explode with tingles all over. The chemistry between them was the one thing she hadn't even begun to forget. And it was the reason her head spun as she opened her mouth and felt Lucius' tongue run across the roof of her mouth.

_**oooOOOooo**_

Narcissa woke up the next morning, happier than she'd been in months. Even if she'd awoken alone. The kiss last night had been just that: a kiss. Alright… a snog. But after they'd finished, breathless, they'd stood holding onto each other and then slowly, their bodies had begun to sway to the music. Then Lucius had left and she'd gone to bed, feeling too wonderful for words.

Padding down the hallway to the kitchen, the blonde stopped short. "Dobby!" she said, surprised. After she'd spoken the young house elf's name, she recalled that Lucius had said he would send the creature over.

"Mistress," Dobby said, jumping down from the chair and looking as though he might be in trouble. "Master is sending Dobby to you. Master is saying-"

Narcissa held her hand up and the house elf quieted immediately. "I know," she said. "Lucius wants you to clean the house and then go shopping for food… correct?" Dobby nodded solemnly, as if expecting to be punished in some way. "Dobby, I'm not going to hurt you. I'm going to put on a pot of tea now."

"Dobby is doing that for Mistress!" The house elf shuffled by his old owner. The blonde had never been mean to a house elf. Most of the time, she couldn't be bothered with them. It irked her that they insisted on doing everything. Yes, it was their job, but she was more than capable to make some tea!

Narcissa sighed. "It's quite alright, Dobby," she said. "Go back to cleaning. If I need your help, I'll call for you." Dobby looked more than happy at that arrangement and (literally) stumbled off to finish what he'd started. He'd always been a clumsy elf. (Walburga, Narcissa's aunt, had even suggested that they behead him because he was such a klutz.)

While the pot of water was boiling, Narcissa went to get dressed for the day. She didn't know if she was actually going to do anything, but she refused to just sit around the house in her pyjamas. She had just sat down in front of her vanity when there was a very loud pounding on the front door. It caused the blonde to drop the brush she'd been holding. Narcissa hesitated, listening to the pounding. She bit her lower lip and rose out of the chair. When she entered the short corridor, she saw Dobby standing there, looking very unsure of himself. Narcissa waved to indicate that he could open the door. As soon as the house elf turned the handle, it flung open. Dobby was slammed between the wall and the door. Jemima Selwyn stood in the makeshift foyer, hands on her hips.

"Jemima!" Narcissa screeched. She didn't care so much that the other woman was here in her house; she cared that Dobby had been squashed like a bug. Her eyes instantly fell on Dobby as he staggered up and closed the door. "You hurt him! Was that necessary? Didn't your mother ever teach you it's rude to slam doors?"

"Was it necessary for Lucius to be here last night?" Jemima snapped, looking ready for a fight.

Narcissa didn't falter. At first, a bout of anger took hold of her. Lucius had told Jemima? Why would he have done that? Then it occurred to her that Lucius hadn't told his fiance. He knew better than that; he wouldn't have had such an idiotic move. "What are you talking about?" Narcissa asked, checking Dobby over quickly as if he were a child. All she needed was for him to get hurt whilst he was here.

"Don't lie to me!" Jemima hollered. "Why else would his engagement ring be missing?"

"How the hell am I supposed to know?" Narcissa retorted, her heart skipping a beat. The ring. She'd dropped it last night and they both must have forgotten about it. Except she didn't have a clue where it was. "Why don't you ask Lucius?"

Jemima glared at Narcissa. "I did ask him," she said tightly. "He said he must've lost it somewhere."

"And you interpreted 'somewhere' as 'Narcissa's place'?" The blonde sighed. "I have no idea where his engagement ring is. Now, please, leave."

They stared at each other for a bit longer before Jemima finally whipped around to face Dobby, who had begun his cleaning again. "Come along, Dobby, we're going home." When she said home, she glanced at Narcissa, as if rubbing it in.

Narcissa stepped between Dobby and Jemima. "Dobby is staying here," she said firmly. "He has specific instructions today, given to him by Lucius-"

"So you _have_ been talking to my fiance!" A look of triumph graced Jemima's face.

Narcissa rolled her eyes; she couldn't believe that she'd used to be friends with this woman. "Yes, through owls!" she lied. "I told him the house was a mess, and that the cupboards were empty. He drew his own conclusions from that, and sent Dobby over."

Jemima's triumphant look disappeared quickly, and she scowled. She narrowed her brown eyes. "You disgust me," she spat out angrily. "Sponging off of my future husband. That'll end when we've gotten married. I refuse to let some slut take whatever she wants from him."

_Slut._

A simple four-letter word. But it made Narcissa's skin crawl. She stared at Jemima blankly. The word left a deep wound, and the brunette was pouring salt into it all too merrily.

"I heard about you and Rookwood," the dark-haired woman continued with an evil smirk. "He told me that it was pathetic, how much you were begging for it. In front of your father's colleagues. How pitiful. You were always a hopeless drunk, Cissy. Your father should be ashamed of you."

Narcissa couldn't believe her ears. She wasn't sure what hurt most: that Rookwood was lying about what had actually happened, or that Cygnus knew the truth – and what if he was ashamed for her? For not fighting back harder? "Get out!" she finally screamed, her breath coming in short gasps. "Get out now, Jemima! Don't ever come back!"

Jemima laughed, but turned around. She exited the house and seconds later, Narcissa heard the familiar _pop_ of Disapparation. She stood there, eyes glazed over, wondering who else knew. Who else had Rookwood told? Probably everyone. It wasn't fair. He got to lie, and she had to go along with it because there was no way she'd tell the world what had happened. Telling her father had been difficult enough. Narcissa took a deep, shaky breath, trying to calm herself.

"Mistress." The name was spoken tentatively and in hushed tones, but it was enough to break Narcissa out of her thoughts. She turned then, and focused on Dobby with a questioning look. The house elf slowly approached his ex-mistress. He reached for her hand, and placed something cool inside of it. He closed her fingers and looked up at her, before scurrying away out of sight. Narcissa watched him leave and then opened her hand. There, in her palm, was Lucius' engagement ring.

_**oooOOOooo**_

Narcissa stepped off of the elevator at the Ministry, blowing past a group of Ministry Officials, who all gave her curious looks. She ignored the stares she received, far too used to them by now. Expertly, she made her way down the corridor towards Lucius' office. She'd taken far too many trips there before. Walking into the part of the building where Lucius' office was, Narcissa headed straight for the familiar room.

"Ma'am!" the secretary called after her. "Ma'am, you can't go back there! You need to have an appointment-"

The rest of the words were drowned out of Narcissa's mind. She could do whatever she pleased. Marching up to the door of Lucius' office, the blonde knocked loudly on it thrice before pushing it open. Inside, she saw Lucius looking up at her from behind his desk. He quickly stood up and waved his wand. The door shut behind Narcissa and she did everything in her power to keep herself from falling apart.

"Cissa-"

"Your pathetic excuse for a fiance forced her way into my home this morning," Narcissa started off boldly, cutting in on Lucius. He stared at her, remaining completely quiet, leaning on his desk. "She was looking for your engagement ring. I swear, Lucius, if you said anything-"

"Cissa, I didn't say a word," Lucius answered quickly, pushing himself off of his desk and walking towards her. "I promise. I would never do that. You trust me, don't you?" He stopped and took her hands in his own, rubbing his thumb over the top of one.

"Yes," Narcissa finally answered, swallowing down the lump in her throat.

Lucius leaned forward to plant a tender kiss to her forehead. "Is that all that's got you upset?" he asked gently. "You seem awfully worked up for just that…"

He was so close and she could smell his cologne. The one she loved so much, but he'd always said he hated. It amazed her how, after one year apart, he still knew her so well. Closing her eyes, Narcissa leaned into Lucius, burying her face into his chest. His strong arms enclosed her safely and he rested his head against the top of hers. He didn't say a word; he just let her cry. And, when Narcissa pulled away, Lucius cupped her face between his hands and wiped her tears away with his thumbs.

"Rookwood raped me," Narcissa told him suddenly, her voice catching. The words felt foreign as she spoke them. It was such a vile word. A vile word fit for a vile man. She hadn't intended to tell Lucius at all, but Jemima's words still echoed in her mind. If Jemima had been told the story, so had Lucius. And Narcissa knew it was the truth as she saw confusion dance across Lucius' face, which was then replaced by anger. He pulled her into him again, and held onto her small frame tightly, doing his best to protect her from the cruel world.


	6. Chapitre Cinq

**a/n:** another update, whoo! this is mainly a filler chapter, though sort of not. i wanted to give insight into what the family dynamics were like, etc. it's not the best chapter, and i apologize for dwelling on the same stuff. the story will be moving along much faster after this chapter, so just bear with me, please! =]

thanks, always, to az for being my amazing beta. the title of the song comes from the avenged sevenfold song. =]

**disclaimer:** how many times do i have to say potterverse isn't mine?

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE CINQ: WELCOME TO THE FAMILY<strong>

"You need to report him," Lucius urged gently, leaning back in his chair so he could look up at Narcissa, who was perched on his desk.

She immediately began to shake her head. "No," she replied firmly. "I just want to forget about it."

Lucius remained quiet, though his eyes searched his ex-wife's face. Narcissa knew that the wheels were spinning in his head; she recognized the look on his face. He would ask her a question and corner her so she wouldn't be able to get away from the issue at hand. He'd done it ever since she could remember. "If you want to forget about it, then why did you tell me?"

And there it was. Narcissa was backed into a corner with no escape. She looked down at her lap and shrugged, unable to give a proper answer. She looked up sheepishly. "I wasn't planning on it," she admitted. She reached into the pocket of her coat and pulled out Lucius' engagement ring. She held it out to him. "This is the real reason I stopped by."

It took a minute, but Lucius eventually reached out and took the ring from her. He slipped it into his pocket, and then pulled his chair closer to Narcissa. He placed his hands on her knees and a shiver snaked its way down her spine.

"You didn't deserve what Rookwood did to you," Lucius said.

"I know that," Narcissa replied quickly, and a bit defensively.

There was a moment of silence. "I really wish you'd report him," he prodded once again. "Cissa, the Ministry has regulations against crimes like that. And if it's a Ministry employee that committed a crime against a civilian, they take it that much more seriously-"

"But they'll need evidence, Lucius!" Narcissa cried. "I haven't got any but the bruises on my arms and legs, which are fading. It's he-said, she-said. It's all circumstantial." Of course, there was the memory itself. A tap of her wand to her head, extract it and drop it into a pensieve… very simple. But she'd never actually do it. She didn't want anyone else to witness it. Besides, she'd been drunk; they'd blame her, anyway.

Lucius sighed heavily, knowing that he was losing the battle. "Just think about it, okay?" And Narcissa nodded because it was the only way to get him to drop the subject.

oooOOOooo

"Bella! We're going to be late! Hurry up!" Narcissa called up the grand staircase of her sister's manor.

Upstairs she heard drawers slamming, and muffled voices. Then she heard the bedroom door open and close and, a few seconds later, Rodolphus Lestrange came waltzing down the stairs.

"She can't find the pants she bought to go with the dress," he explained in a bored tone, though he looked a little confused. Narcissa almost began to explain that the dress her sister had purchased clung to the body, so it was important to wear discreet pants, but she caught herself at the last minute. Rodolphus didn't care about that. "So… Regulus is turning how old?"

"Oh… nineteen," Narcissa replied, giving her brother-in-law a small smile.

Rodolphus nodded. "Rabastan will be twenty-six in June," he commented. He'd never been very good at small talk. "Your birthday is in May, is it not, Narcissa?"

"May, yes, that's correct," she replied with a nod. "I'll be twenty-four."

"The only birthday that matters in this house is mine," Bellatrix's haughty voice rang out from the very top of the staircase. She began to descend the stairs.

Rodolphus rolled his eyes. "Did you find your pants, dear?" he asked.

Bellatrix smirked and stepped down from the last step. "I did not," she told him. She pressed a kiss to her sister's cheek and then pushed through the two of them towards the coat rack.

"So, you're wearing-"

"Nothing," Bellatrix said, cutting her husband off. "It's your lucky night." She winked.

Narcissa stepped towards her elder sister, looking mildly repulsed and fairly concerned. She knew that her sister was being completely serious. "Bella, you should really put something on," she insisted in a low voice. "We're going to be with _family_."

Bellatrix laughed. "Oh, Cissy, you're such a prude," she said. She looked up at her husband, her eyes sparkling with mischievousness. "You know, Rod, a lot of my pants seem to be missing. I think you've been eating through the wrong ones…"

Laughter filled the foyer, but it only came from Bellatrix and Rodolphus. Narcissa stood there, face bright red, wishing they could just be on their way by now. And it wasn't as if she had an excuse for being beet red; the manor was drafty, after all. She wasn't embarrassed by sex (or other sexual acts, for that matter), but she did feel uncomfortable discussing it with other people. Sex, making love, whatever one chose to call it… was a very personal and private matter.

"Cissy, come on! Lighten up!" Bellatrix said, catching sight of her sister's scarlet face. She finally shrugged on her coat. "I'm sure Lucius has torn through your pants with just his teeth."

Just when Narcissa thought she couldn't become any more embarrassed, she was. She stood there, frozen and irked by Bella's childish behavior. "Have you been drinking?" the blonde snapped. It was a rhetorical question, and she turned on her heel and marched to the front door, prepared to Disapparate without Bellatrix or Rodolphus.

"Cissy!" Bellatrix called after her sister. Narcissa could hear her heels scraping across the hardwood floor. Right as the blonde opened the door, Bellatrix reached her side. She grabbed hold of her sister's arm and they walked outside together. The dark-haired witch looked over her shoulder. "Rod, I'm going with Cissy. We'll meet you there – and, please, don't Apparate to the wrong street! I don't want to waste my time looking for you."

Narcissa remained quiet as they walked far enough away from the house to Disapparate. She didn't bother shaking her sister off of her arm because she knew it would only ensue some sort of argument between them.

"I'm sorry I embarrassed you," Bellatrix said as they stopped. "I forget you're not as crude as I am."

"It's fine," Narcissa replied tightly, though she tried to let it go. She turned to her sister and boldly said, "I just miss it… sex with Lucius. I miss _him_."

Bellatrix looked sympathetic for just a moment before she shrugged. "There are other men, Cissy," she replied, reaching out to smooth down her sister's hair though there wasn't any need for it. Bellatrix could be comforting when she felt like it. "Forget about Lucius. He let the best thing he'd ever had get away from him. He's an idiot. And I'd _Crucio_ his arse if I knew for certain that I wouldn't wake up with you standing above me, ready for a duel."

Narcissa choked out a laugh and huddled closer to her sister. "You're wicked," she stated, the smile never falling from her face.

A few seconds later, they Disapparated with a pop, as did Rodolphus. They landed easily, having grown up using side-Apparition and also becoming used to the odd sensation when they began doing it on their own. Narcissa slipped from her sister's strong hold, and hurried toward her aunt and uncle's home. She skipped up the stairs and knocked on the door. It was opened by a taller house elf, Kreacher. Stepping around him, the blonde slipped out of her winter coat and headed towards the voices she heard further in the house. But as she drew nearer, Narcissa was aware that the topic of discussion was herself. She stopped just outside of the room to listen.

"She won't stay young forever, Cygnus," Walburga was saying.

There was a heavy, audible sigh. "The matter is between my daughter, and myself," Cygnus replied, obviously irritated.

"Augustus Rookwood is her only option at this point," Walburga argued, refusing to yield to her brother's wishes. There was a pause. "Unless, of course… what about your brother's son, Druella?"

"Evan?" Druella echoed, already sounding opposed to the idea. "No… no, Evan's got a steady girlfriend. I believe he's looking for engagement rings."

"Oh, pity. They would have made beautiful children-"

"Eavesdropping, Cissy?" Bellatrix whispered in her sister's ear, coming to stand behind her. Whatever else Walburga had said, if anything, was lost now. Narcissa gave her sister a sharp look and wriggled away from her, stepping into the room. It went deadly quiet for a moment; Cygnus was the first to react.

"Ah, my girls!" he said brightly, striding over to them. He kissed both of their cheeks, and shook Rodolphus' hand. Bellatrix brushed by her sister, following her father to the table and sitting down beside him. Rodolphus took the seat next to her, and began an instant conversation with Orion.

Narcissa stood in the room awkwardly, feeling out of place with her family for the first time. She wondered if this was how Andromeda felt constantly – Sirius, too. Like the people before her, the people she loved most, were complete strangers. The blonde surveyed the crowd, realizing that Regulus wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Where's Reg?" Narcissa inquired, directing the question at her aunt. Walburga met her niece's questioning look with a slightly menacing one of her own. She looked the leggy blonde up and down. It took all of Narcissa's will to keep herself from squirming under the intense glare.

"Regulus is upstairs, in his room," she finally offered. "A friend of his stopped by. Why don't you go fetch him, dear?" _Dear_, said unaffectionately. For whatever reason, unbeknownst to Narcissa, Walburga had never liked her too much. She'd always been the cruelest to the blonde, locking her in rooms or giving the others sweets but never her. When Narcissa had been small, she often left her aunt's home with her arms wrapped tightly around her father's neck, and tears spilling out from her blue eyes. When they'd arrive home, it usually took Druella hours to calm down her youngest.

Narcissa nodded curtly. "Of course."

She spun around abruptly, and headed down the hallway to the staircase. Narcissa took the stairs carefully, having nearly slipped both going up and coming down them one too many times. She reached the topmost floor of the narrow house and walked down to Regulus' room. The door was slightly ajar and, pushing it open, Narcissa called out, "Reg?"

"Cissy!" Regulus exclaimed in surprise. He wiped his mouth and glanced at the other person in the room, whom Narcissa recognized as Castalia Yaxley's younger brother, Tristan.

Narcissa looked between the two boys before finally stepping forward. "Hello, Tristan," she said with a smile. "How are you?"

"Very well, thank you," Tristan replied. He glanced at Regulus out of the corner of his eye. "And yourself?"

"The same, thanks," Narcissa replied. She gave him one last smile before looking at her younger cousin, who was – if she was not mistaken – blushing. Not a fair amount, but the blonde was positive there was color in his cheeks. "Reg, your mum wanted me to fetch you. We're all here now." She looked at Tristan Avery again. "I'm sure you're more than welcome to stay, Tristan. If my aunt hasn't invited you to stay, then I'm extending an invitation. You can be my date." She didn't want to insult Aunt Walburga in front of Regulus; but it would be so rude if the young man hadn't received an invitation to dinner.

Tristan laughed. "That's alright, Narcissa," he said. "Walburga did invite me, but I'm afraid I have other plans…"

"Of course," Narcissa replied politely. She took a step back. "Well… I'll be going back downstairs now. Reg, please don't take too long. Tristan, have a good night!" Beaming at the two of them, Narcissa turned around and made her way back downstairs.

When she arrived in the kitchen again, she took a seat next to her mother and sighed. Druella scooted her chair closer to her daughter and kissed the side of Narcissa's head. "Is everything alright, darling?" she whispered in the young woman's ear. Mother and daughter hadn't spoken in a few weeks. They usually owled frequently and tried to get together at least once a week to chat.

Narcissa nodded, though she reached under the table to grab hold of her mother's hand. "Yes," she replied firmly. Her mother kissed her hair again, and squeezed her hand.

oooOOOooo

Five glasses of elf-made wine, a shot of Firewhiskey, a full meal and a bite of birthday cake later, Narcissa was feeling pretty good. Her stomach ached from all of the laughter and her cheeks hurt from smiling so much. She hadn't felt so at ease with everything in a long time. The children, as they were still referred to as, were in the living room, playing some drinking game that Bellatrix had suggested and then forced everyone to agree to play. The adults were still in the kitchen, causing their own ruckus.

All four of them were seated on the floor, as if they were children again. It was different from when they were kids, though, because Rodolphus was in the place of either Sirius or Andromeda. Thinking about her estranged sister caused Narcissa to frown as she leaned against Regulus. His arm was wrapped tightly around her, keeping her close.

"Bella, please," Narcissa whined, "I can't drink anymore."

Bellatrix snorted and rolled her eyes. "You were always a lightweight, Cissy," she commented, looking at her sister with a darkly playful grin.

Narcissa smiled sarcastically. "You remind me every chance you get, dear sister."

Bellatrix chortled. "Alright, go!" she said, shooing her sister off.

Regulus helped his cousin to her feet and the blonde set off for the kitchen, intent on her father bringing her home. She walked up to him in the kitchen, a tired smile on her face.

"How are you, princess?" Cygnus murmured, pressing a kiss to her hair as he pulled her in close to him. Narcissa mmhmm'd, because her Uncle Orion was in the middle of speaking (what about, she didn't care to know), and rested her head on her father's shoulder. She was nearly asleep when there was a loud commotion behind her.

A chair scraped across the hardwood, and then fell to the floor with a 'bang'. Narcissa twisted in her father's hold to see what was going on. She saw her mother, standing up and glaring down at Walburga, who looked as if she were about to get out of her seat. Narcissa could feel her father's hold tighten on her as he tried to tug her away from the scene; she kept her feet planted firmly (as firmly as she could, anyway) where they were.

"Leave her alone," Druella warned. Walburga glanced over at her niece, her husband, and her brother; though her dark eyes settled on Narcissa. "You've tormented her ever since she was a child. She hasn't done a thing to you."

Walburga's eyes slid from blonde to blonde, narrowing darkly. "Open your eyes, Druella, and look at her," she spat angrily, standing up now. "She's a disgrace to the family. She can't have kids, so her _husband's father_ forces them to get divorced. She gets one marriage proposal after a year, and she turns it down – Cygnus!" Walburga turned her attention to her brother. "How could you allow that to happen? Why would you even give her a choice?"

Druella spoke up before her husband had a chance to. "Because, Walburga," she said in a low voice as the others entered the room, "we want her to be _happy_. We don't want her to be miserable like you. Nobody wanted you, either; so you were forced to marry your second cousin."

Narcissa stood there, nearly dumbfounded. How had this even started? And why wasn't her father stopping it? Her mother and aunt, she realized after a beat, were too fast for the men to interject.

"You disgust me," Walburga snapped. "As does your pathetic daughter. Tell them, Cygnus," she went on, her head whipping around to look at her brother once more. "Tell them about how you wished Narcissa had been a boy."

The statement caught Narcissa off guard. It hurt, as if her entire body had suffered from numerous bee stings. She stumbled away from her father, looking up at him as if she were really seeing him for the first time. "Is that true?" she asked. Behind her, she was aware of Bellatrix, who had stepped forward to demonstrate her support for her sister.

Cygnus shook his head. "No, it's not," he said almost pleadingly.

But Narcissa's mind was already made up. "Of course it's true," she said. "How could I have been so blind? It's only natural that you want a son – and I was your last chance!" She stopped herself from saying any more. Instead, she turned on her heel and bumped into her sister, who steadied them both.

"C'mon, Cissy," Bellatrix mumbled to her sister. She glanced over her shoulder at the adults, shooting daggers at them all. She then escorted her sister down the hallway and towards the front door. "I'll bring you home."

"Okay," Narcissa said absently as she tugged on her coat. She glanced up and looked down the hallway. Regulus stood not too far off. "Happy birthday, Reg." She offered him a weary smile before pulling the door open and stepping out into the cold, crisp air that was waiting to greet her.


	7. Chapitre Six

**a/n:** i'm sorry for taking a while to update this! the muse that i had went away. but hopefully it's back now! =D i hope you all enjoy this update. it's short, and the next chapter will be short as well. but the story is moving along, so yay! =D

**disclaimer:** i don't own it!

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE SIX: QUIET VIOLENCE<strong>

A few weeks had passed since Regulus' birthday dinner and the family brawl that had been served as dessert, and Narcissa found herself in the second half of February, looking forward to the coming months. She'd been avoiding her father and her aunt at all costs; she wasn't ready to face either of them yet. After giving herself a few days to calm down, she'd realized how daft she'd been. At least in regards to her father; her aunt, well… Narcissa wasn't sure if she'd ever forgive Walburga, or stop being angry with her. She always had to pick on the blonde; _why?_

During those weeks, Narcissa had kept herself busy. Dobby was now more or less a permanent fixture in her home, which was nicer than she cared to admit. He might be a house elf, but at least he was someone to talk to (even if he didn't listen or understand most of the time). Narcissa had gone shopping with Castalia and they'd been devising a plan to tell her husband the truth. Edmund already knew, and was more than willing to marry Talia. It was sweet, almost fairytale-like, and Narcissa wondered if Yaxley would ever let go of his wife so easily – whether or not she was pregnant with another man's child. On another note, Lucius had been keeping in touch with his ex-wife (and making sure that his fiance stayed away). There hadn't been any more kisses, much to Narcissa's disappointment, and they hadn't discussed the one they'd shared that lovely evening. It was as if it had never happened.

One evening, as the blonde was retiring for the night, there came a short knock on the door. Narcissa paused, her breathing quickened and her heart began to beat a little faster. The knock came again and she almost turned around and went to bed, hoping that whomever it was would just go away. But then she heard his voice call out her nickname; he never called her Cissy. It was the first indication for Narcissa that something was wrong, or that Lucius was completely and utterly pissed. She moved towards the door swiftly, unlocking it with a flick of her wand. She opened it and found Lucius standing on the stairs that led up to her small house. His long, blonde hair was straggly and had fallen out from its usual ponytail. There were flecks of blood on his white shirt, and as Narcissa's blue eyes quickly traveled to his hands, she saw they were covered in blood as well.

"Lucius," she breathed out as he stepped into the house. Narcissa shut and locked the door, then flicked her wand to turn on the lights. She stepped up to him, running her eyes over the mess in front of her. "What happened?" In the light, she could see that there was a gash across Lucius' cheek, though the blood had dried. He had a developing bruise around one eye as well.

"I fought him," Lucius said, as if it explained everything. He met her eyes.

"Fought _who_?"

"Rookwood." Narcissa stood there, dumbfounded. She didn't know what to say. Luckily, Lucius continued on after a moment. "There was a meeting tonight and, the entire time, all I could think about was the story he'd told me and Jemima… and how it wasn't true, and that the truth… that the truth was a whole lot worse. I was sitting there, and I just got pissed off. You know? I got angrier and angrier the more I thought about it. And I was also angry because I know nothing will happen to him." He paused and Narcissa swallowed. She knew that Lucius had wanted her to report the rape, but she never had. "So I told him that we needed to talk after the meeting – to make a plan, because we've got a mission together. Once we got outside… I just went after him. With my hands, not magic. You should see him," he added. "He looks a lot worse. Actually… I left him unconscious…"

Narcissa still had no idea how to respond. Rookwood deserved to be left unconscious. Maybe some rabid animal would happen upon his body, think he was dead, and start devouring him. She sighed heavily, looking defeated and tired. "Are you alright?" she asked. "Aside from the cut and bruising on your face… whose blood is that on your hands?"

"Mine," Lucius replied right away and Narcissa narrowed her eyes. "It is… the cut on my face was from his ring. He got my leg with a knife…"

"He had a _knife_?" Narcissa asked in surprise, her eyes going wide. Why couldn't they have just hurled some hexes around instead of fighting the Muggle way?

Lucius nodded solemnly. "I'm alright, though," he promised with a smile. "I just need to wash up."

"Come on." Narcissa almost grabbed his hand, but drew back her arm at the last second. She pulled a face at the blood, and headed off towards the bathroom in her room. When they reached it, Lucius stepped up to the sink to wash the blood from his hands and forearms. Once he was done, Narcissa offered to take his shirt to clean so he could get to healing his wounds. The moment Lucius removed his shirt, Narcissa bit her lower lip in silent punishment. Why had she asked him to do that? It was a long moment before she could drag her eyes away from his body. She thought he looked more fit, more toned. She had a flashback of sitting behind him in bed and running her hands down his chest and abdomen, in an attempt to get him to put a book down and pay attention to her. (It had worked, too.) Narcissa was tempted now to reach out and touch him… but she knew she couldn't. So she turned her attention to Lucius' shirt and used a cleaning spell to get the bloodstains out.

"Lucius," Narcissa said tentatively after a few minutes. She watched as he finished washing his face and grabbed the towel hanging on the wall to dry off. He looked at her quizzically. "Can you please just let it go? It's done and over with. I just want to forget about it."

She wasn't able to get a feel of what Lucius might be thinking. His face gave way to no emotion. "If that's what you want," he finally said, though his tones were a bit clipped.

"It is," Narcissa said, clutching his shirt between her hands.

Lucius gave her a tight smile, and he reached out for the piece of clothing. Narcissa handed it to him and turned to leave. As she stepped over the threshold, she paused and looked back at her ex-husband. "Jemima is a lucky woman," she told him. Her blue eyes watered and she quickly walked away before Lucius had a chance to respond.

_**oooOOOooo**_

_Cissy,_

_Come quickly. Talia's in the hospital. Second floor, room 32._

_- Alecto_

Narcissa's heart raced and she read the message three more times before the owl nipped at her fingers, as if reminding her to get going. She dropped the letter to the floor and hurried to her room. She dressed in a fury, not bothering to brush her hair or even put some glamor on. She slipped into comfortable clothing, rushed out the door, and the next thing she knew, she was walking briskly down the corridor of the second floor. It seemed to take forever to reach the room Alecto had written down in her letter, and when she finally did, she was afraid to look inside.

"There you are!"

"Sorry, I–" Narcissa began to say before her eyes moved from Alecto to Talia, who was lying down on a hospital bed, sleeping. Even from where she stood, Narcissa could see the bruising on her friend's face. She looked back towards Alecto. "What happened?"

"Yaxley," Alecto replied, and it answered all of the questions in Narcissa's mind.

"Did she lose the baby?"

Alecto blinked, looked at Talia and then back to Narcissa. "I didn't know she was pregnant," she said in hushed tones. "But that explains why the Healers were worried about where she was bleeding…"

Narcissa's stomach lurched and she stepped towards the bed. Poor Talia. They were supposed to talk with Yaxley together. Why hadn't she waited? They'd made a plan! The blonde sank down on the edge of the bed, and reached for her best friend's hand. She held onto it tightly, her blue eyes searching the bruised and battered face of the woman before her.

"Did you contact Tristan?" Narcissa asked quietly, looking over her shoulder at Alecto. The other woman nodded in response, and Narcissa looked back at Talia.

It was a few more minutes before Talia opened her eyes. She looked tired and a little confused. She attempted to smile up at Narcissa, but winced instead, and closed her eyes again. She squeezed her friend's hand tightly. "Cissy?" Talia croaked out. "Cissy… the baby…"

"I know, I know," Narcissa said gently, glancing down at where Talia's stomach was hidden under sheets. She swallowed, knowing that she couldn't tell her best friend she might have lost the baby. Narcissa didn't know, and the Healers wouldn't release that sort of information. "I'm sure the baby's fine. Just rest now. Everything is going to be okay." She brushed a few stray strands of hair out of Talia's face, and gave her best friend a small smile.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"How did you find her?" Narcissa asked Alecto. They were sat in the tea room on the uppermost floor of the hospital. Tristan had arrived nearly an hour ago and, after they'd filled him in with what they could, the women had gone up to have some tea.

"We had plans for this afternoon," Alecto explained. She leaned forward, across the table, and glanced around before speaking in a very low voice. "He wouldn't stop, Cissy – not even when I walked into the house. I had to use the full body-bind curse to stop him. He was going to kill her."

Narcissa swallowed and glanced down at her hands resting in her lap. "He's such a terrible man," she whispered. She looked up suddenly, remembering something Lucius had told her to do. "Tristan should file a complaint with the Ministry – Yaxley's a Ministry official! They can't just let him get away with it. They'll do an investigation."

"It'll make things worse for her at home," Alecto replied, shaking her head.

"She's not going to be _living_ with him," Narcissa said firmly, albeit coolly. "There's no way Tristan will let his sister go back there. If he won't do anything about it, then I will. Talia can live with me."

"Cissy, you can't save her. She dug her own grave."

The words cut deep. Narcissa's blue eyes turned nearly to ice as she stared at the woman seated across from her. "She's my best friend, Alecto. I'm not just going to sit by and watch her go through this any longer. If you were any kind of friend, you would do everything in your power to make sure she doesn't die so young." She stood up, and reached into her purse to fish out two Galleons. She dropped them on the table. "There's enough for both of us." Then she stalked stiffly from the room.


	8. Chapitre Sept

**a/n:** sorry it's taken me a while to update! my muse was running low, but it should be better now. ^^ hopefully the next few chapters will be longer than this one is. it's mostly filler... =X i'm a terrible person, i know. thanks, az, for being my wonderful beta! and than you to everyone for reviewing! the chapter title is a song by the band placebo.

oh, you'll need to know some french terms: Blanquette de veau (veal ragout) and poire Belle-Hélène (french dessert with pears and chocolate and vanilla ice cream and some more yummy things.) feel free to google images of either things to get an idea of what they look like!

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE SEPT: KINGS OF MEDICINE<strong>

Narcissa closed her eyes as her mother raked her fingers through her blonde hair, feeling like a little girl again. She'd always loved it whenever her mother (or her sisters, for that matter – so long as they were being nice) would brush her hair or make it look pretty for a special occasion. Tonight, it was the latter. Narcissa had (very reluctantly) agreed to go on a blind date with a friend of her cousin's. He was a pureblood wizard who had recently moved from France to England, and was apparently very good friends with the French Rosiers. He claimed to have seen the youngest Black daughter at the New Year's party, and had been trying to find a way to contact her; then he'd finally mentioned his troubles to Evan, who had told his aunt and… voilà! Now Narcissa had a date – and one she wasn't particularly keen on attending.

"How is your friend?" Druella asked softly – cautiously – as she worked on her daughter's hair.

Narcissa hesitated slightly before dropping her gaze to her lap. She didn't need further explanations to know they were speaking of Talia. "She's doing well, considering," she told her mother. "She's leaving the hospital this week – she'll live with her brother. They're going to file for an annulment…" Her voice trailed off, but then she perked up, remembering something. "She didn't lose the baby. Edmund Greengrass is going to ask for her hand."

Druella dropped her head and in the next moment, Narcissa felt a kiss to her hair. "I'm glad to hear that, sweetheart," she replied.

"She's lucky."

"And so are you, Narcissa. Give it time, darling, give it time."

**_oooOOOooo_**

Narcissa lifted her glass of wine to her lips and took a sip, swallowing it as she looked around the restaurant. She wasn't sure where they were exactly; she'd never been to this place before. But the atmosphere was pleasant, the wine was good and the man seated across from her was… handsome. Nowhere near Lucius' level of handsomeness, though. She smiled at him politely. He was nice, but he spoke too much and never gave her the chance to say a thing – he had even ordered for her, which was more infuriating and degrading than Narcissa had let on.

"Do you like your dish, Narcissa?" the man, Marcel, asked.

Narcissa snapped her head around to look at her date. "Hmm- what?" she asked, leaning over the table ever so slightly, pretending that she hadn't heard him instead of suggesting that she'd been ignoring him.

Marcel's brown eyes darted down quickly to Narcissa's chest, and she quickly sat up. He met her gaze again and smiled. "I said, do you like your dish? You have not touched much of it," he said.

"Oh." Narcissa looked down at the meal in front of her. Blanquette de veau – not very high on her list of favorite meals. She looked back up at Marcel. "It's… a bit heavy, if I'm being perfectly honest. I think it might be the sauce. And I usually don't eat a lot of meat…" She let her sentence hang in the air, though Marcel seemed undisturbed by what she had to say.

"Ah, but do you eat dessert?" he asked, grinning.

Perhaps his grin was contagious, because Narcissa found herself laughing and nodded before she could stop herself. "Dessert would be nice," she admitted.

"Do you have a preference?" Marcel asked.

Narcissa opened her mouth to say poire Belle-Hélène, but she closed it quickly. That was the dessert she usually shared with Lucius; she wasn't going to have it with some new man. So she shook her head and let Marcel pick the dessert. Thankfully, he ordered a macaron for each of them. That was something she'd eat.

**_oooOOOooo_**

"I had a lovely evening," Marcel said to Narcissa as they left the restaurant.

"As did I," Narcissa agreed readily. The night hadn't been ideal, but it had been somewhat pleasurable.

"I am glad. So we will see each other soon then?"

Narcissa hesitated before saying, "Perhaps." She gave him a smile so he wouldn't feel too bad. He returned the expression and took a step towards her, and Narcissa tensed instantly. She knew what he was going to do, and she turned her head to the side as Marcel leaned in to kiss her. She stared out into the street, feeling Marcel retract and step away from her. She kept her eyes trained to the distance, until she heard Marcel wish her a good night, and then he disappeared before she had a chance to reply.

She was pitiful.

Narcissa walked in the cold until she reached a safe place to Disapparate back to her home. She landed just outside of the gate and walked through it, up to her front door. She was about to open it when someone else did from the inside. Narcissa paused, already reaching for her wand, when Bellatrix appeared in the doorway.

"Bella, what are you –"

"Where have you been?" Bellatrix snapped.

"I was –"

Bellatrix held up her hand and Narcissa was silenced right away, though she remained confused as to why her sister wouldn't let her answer the question. "Whatever, I don't care," Bellatrix said. "I'm here because Mother asked me to tell you about Father –"

"What about him?" Narcissa asked, her heart skipping a beat. She stepped closer to her sister, her breath coming in short gasps now. "What happened?"

"He's in the hospital, Narcissa."


	9. Chapter Huit

**a/n:** thank you for the reviews and everyone's continued support! special thanks to az for her feedback and beta skills! x3 it means so much. this chapter is the one to get the ball rolling... =P it's sad, but i hope you enjoy it nonetheless. the title is the name of a rascal flatts song (though cancer has nothing to do with the chapter.)

**disclaimer:** world of harry potter is all j.k. rowling's.

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE HUIT: SKIN<strong>

"But what _happened_, Mother?" Narcissa asked urgently as she stood in front of her mother, trying to get Druella to look her straight in the face. So far she'd heard what might be _wrong_ with her father (the Healers weren't positive), but not what had _happened_ – she didn't know the events that had led up to Cygnus' "fainting spell".

"Narcissa," Druella snapped, giving her youngest daughter a warning look. "I told you what I know: your father was with some colleagues. They said he was up and speaking one moment, and in the next, he was on the floor-"

"Seizing," Narcissa finished quietly, glancing down the corridor as if expecting her father to be standing there, laughing and saying that he was completely fine. She didn't even fully understand what a seizure was. The Healers had tried explaining it, but Narcissa knew little to nothing about the goings-on of the human body, let alone all of the terminology. And, considering that the Healers were very busy and trying to help not only Cygnus but other patients as well, she had simply played it off like everything made perfect sense.

"He's going to be fine," Bellatrix said, tossing a magazine down onto the top of a table in the tea room. She yawned and leaned back in her chair, arms folded over her chest. She looked utterly _bored_.

"It's nice that you seem so concerned," Druella shot at her eldest daughter. Her face twisted into a look of disgust.

Bellatrix sneered back. "Mother, we've been here for _five hours_," she replied, leaning over the table as if to express just how painful being at a hospital for such a period of time was. "I'm _bored_, I want to go _home_. I want to _sleep_. Rodolphus is probably wondering where I am."

"Is that so?" Druella muttered, studying her daughter. Narcissa could feel the tension between them and she thumbed the edges of a napkin lying on the table in front of her. "Then go home, Bellatrix. Sleep is obviously far more important than your father or his health."

"Mother!" Bellatrix snapped, standing up and leaning down. She was trying to be intimidating. "There's nothing we can do. All of us should go home and rest, that way we're here when Father actually needs us-"

"He needs us right now-"

"He's not even awake!" Bellatrix said loudly, exasperated, falling back into her chair. Several other people looked their way and Narcissa could feel her cheeks burn.

"Mother, perhaps Bella is right," Narcissa chimed in before either of them could speak. It was obvious that they were both tired and overwhelmed. That combination wasn't going to make anyone agreeable. Druella gave her daughter a leveled look. "It's, what…? It's three in the morning. We should sleep. We can come back in the morning. They'll let us see him then…"

There was silence before Druella sighed, and stood up. She pushed in her chair and gave both of her daughters sharp looks. "Well," she said, "are you coming?" Narcissa looked at her sister, who was rolling her eyes. They both stood up at the same time and followed their mother out of the tea room, down the lift, and out of the hospital. Bellatrix bid them both goodnight and then was gone with a pop.

Narcissa looked at her mother with a slight frown. Druella was holding herself, almost as if she were trying to keep herself warm and – while that may have been a part of it – Narcissa also knew that her mother was just trying to hold herself together. "Mother," she said gently, making her way towards Druella, "would you prefer it if I stayed with you for the night?"

Druella turned to look at her daughter, her expression unreadable. There was silence and the only thing Narcissa could hear was the slight breeze whizzing by her ears. "If that is what you'd like to do," the older blonde witch said.

The truth was, Narcissa wanted to go home and crawl into her own bed. She knew, however, that her mother would be eased if someone else were in the house with her. And wasn't family most important? Narcissa smiled and nodded. "Of course," she replied. "I'll have to stop home first to pack an overnight bag, but then I'll be over."

"Thank you, dear," Druella finally said, returning her daughter's smile. "I'll see you soon."

Mother and daughter went back to their homes, however Narcissa didn't have the luxury of going right to sleep. Instead, she grabbed a small sack and began to fill it with some necessaries: her nightclothes, an outfit for tomorrow, make-up, perfume, face wash, two pairs of shoes and some other things. Then she used the fireplace to Floo to her mother's home.

Narcissa stepped from the hearth into the sitting room and then strode purposefully upstairs. She was sure that her mother was in bed by now. She tiptoed to her mother's bedroom and carefully opened the door. Sure enough, Druella was already in bed. Narcissa wondered what the point of her staying the night even was. She closed the bedroom door and headed toward her own room. She paused in the doorway, however, and stared into the dark room. An image flashed quickly before her eyes; Rookwood on top of her, holding her arms above her head so she was helpless. Narcissa blinked and it was gone, but now she felt ill. She turned away from the room, closed the door and headed down to a guestroom. She was almost there when she felt her stomach lurch and inch its way up her throat. Thankfully, the bathroom wasn't too far away.

The rest of the night was just as terrible. A nasty taste was left in her mouth from vomiting, no matter how many times she rinsed it. Her heart raced, keeping her awake for most of the night. She tossed and turned, willing herself to sleep. Every creak of the old house made her freeze. She would have given anything to be in the safety of her own home right now. It was only when light started to peek through the window that Narcissa did finally allow herself to get some rest.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"Narcissa!"

The blonde jolted awake, opening her eyes quickly and then closing them just as fast when the light seemed to burn right through.

"Narcissa, wake up," Druella insisted. Narcissa felt her mother sit on the edge of the bed. "I told you fifteen minutes ago to get up – and you went back to sleep. We need to leave in ten minutes."

"I'll be ready," Narcissa promised, slowly opening her eyes and looking up at her mother. She didn't recall Druella ever waking her up before this.

"Why are you in here, anyway? It took me some time to find you this morning," her mother went on. "I was worried; I thought something had happened to you…"

Narcissa swallowed and slowly pushed herself into a sitting position. "I'm fine. I'm sorry to have worried you," she said automatically. "My room was too cold…"

Druella stared at her daughter, with one eyebrow raised. They studied one another for a minute before Druella stood up. "Please hurry," she urged. Then she left the room to give her daughter some privacy. In eight minutes, Narcissa was dressed and had made the rest of herself look very presentable. She floated down the stairs and met her mother in the foyer. Grabbing her coat, Narcissa shrugged it on and then followed Druella outside into the cold weather. When the air nipped at her cheeks, she sucked in her breath, her body nearly in shock. March was such a temperamental month…

Mother and daughter Apparated to St. Mungo's Hospital in London, where they quickly clambered in, out of the cold. Narcissa followed her mother to the lift and they entered it silently. She pretended to examine her nails and cuticles, but the blonde was really studying her mother from under her lashes. Druella looked tired… very nervous, anxious and worried. She seemed to have aged overnight and it was a terrible tragedy.

"I'm sure Father's doing much better today," Narcissa commented softly, lifting her head, trying to sound optimistic. Her mother glanced at her out of the corner of her eyes.

"We'll soon find out," Druella replied tightly.

That was a cue for Narcissa to keep quiet. Her mother didn't have to say it; the young woman could just tell by Druella's tone or expressions. So she closed her mouth and followed her mother out of the lift and down towards her father's hospital room. Ahead, there were several Healers gathered in front of a door… and as they approached, Narcissa realized that it was the one leading to her father's room. Her pace increased, as did the rhythm of her heart. Suddenly, she felt like a little girl again and wanted nothing more than to grab her mother's hand and hang on to it tightly.

"Mrs. Black," the head male Healer, William Brocklehurst, said as the two reached the small group. He nodded at Narcissa. "I'm glad you're here. We need to talk. Please come with me."

Druella didn't even look at Narcissa as she stepped forward to follow William down the corridor. Narcissa watched them leave, feeling lost and alone, before turning to the remaining Healers.

"Has something happened to my father?" she asked tentatively, trying to hide the fact that her voice was breaking.

The four Healers looked at one another, and three of them stalked away without a word a few seconds later. The only one left behind was an older woman, whose name Narcissa did not know. She stared at the mousy-brown haired woman before her, fearing the worst.

"We've discovered the cause of your father's sickness," the Healer started off quietly and slowly, as if she were speaking to a child and not an adult. "He's suffering from a bacterial meningitis infection. Do you know what that is, Miss Black?" Narcissa wanted to snap "does it look like I do?", but she choked back the words. Instead she shook her head, giving the Healer a chance to explain. "It's an infection surrounding the brain and spinal cord, that causes the tissue around the brain to swell-"

"Is he going to be alright?" Narcissa blurted out. What the Healer was saying didn't make any sense. All she cared about was her father; she just wanted him to survive.

But there was a slight hesitation and the Healer swallowed. She glanced down the corridor as if she wasn't supposed to be talking about it. When she spoke, her voice was very low and Narcissa had to step closer to hear her. "It appears that your father has had this infection for quite some time," she started off. "That's already one thing working against his chances. On top of that… he's had a seizure. He had two more during the night. Miss Black, I'm sorry to have to tell you, but the chances of him making a full recovery do not look well."

"No," Narcissa said firmly, taking a step away from the Healer as if she were an infection herself. "No. You have no idea what you're talking about. You're just… you're some lowly Healer. You have no idea what you're saying. Where did that man take my mother? He knows how to do his job-"

"Miss Black-"

"NO!" Narcissa nearly yelled, her voice full of anger. She swallowed and lowered her voice. "I want to see him-"

The Healer was already shaking her head. "I can't let you in there," she said. "It's contagious… Have you been in contact with him recently? You should be tested for it yourself-"

But Narcissa tuned her out as she stared through the small window in the door. She didn't understand anything that was going on. What broke her out of her trance was a loud cry coming from down the corridor, and Narcissa was sure it was her mother. It was all she could do to keep herself from breaking down.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"Miss Black, which side are you more comfortable on?" William Brocklehurst asked the young blonde witch later that afternoon.

Narcissa swallowed and it took her a moment to realize what the Healer had asked her. "My left," she replied vaguely, still not all there. After a discussion with the family, it was highly recommended that they each go through a spinal tap to test them for the meningitis infection. There was some hesitation, however, because the routine was very _muggle_. It took some coaxing, but the Healers managed to explain that the wizarding world had yet to find a cure for such an infection - or a different way to test it. In the end, none of the three women were particularly happy to go through with the test (in fact, Narcissa was positive that Bellatrix had refused it), but the mortality rate outweighed everything else.

"Okay," William said, "after I apply the local anesthetic and iodine, I will need you to lie down on your left side. Can you do that?"

"Yes, I'm not a child," Narcissa snapped, glancing over her bare shoulder at the Healer to give him a dirty look. She was hugging a pillow to the front of her body and her blonde hair had been tied up.

There was silence and then Narcissa heard plastic unwrapping. She looked up at the person standing next to her – Lucius. She'd written him almost immediately after the meeting with the Healers, begging him to meet her at the hospital. When it was time for her to undergo the spinal tap, he had insisted on being there, despite the Healers' attempts to keep him out.

"Lower your head, Miss Black," William said very seriously. Narcissa obeyed and Lucius stepped closer to her, slipping his hand into hers against the pillow. She gripped it tightly. "You're going to feel a pinch in a moment... it's just the anesthetic…"

The "pinch" was more like a very sharp sting and Narcissa bit down on the pillow whilst squeezing her eyes shut. Her nails dug into Lucius' skin and she was sure she drew blood. Then there was a cool liquid on her back and after that, Narcissa was told to lie down on her left side. As instructed, she curled into the best fetal position she could, so her back was at its most exposed point. Lucius' hand was still in hers and her blue eyes were still shut tightly, trying to hold back her tears.

"Miss Black, I'm going to insert the other needle now," William explained. "You still may feel a slight pinch – it'll be more like pressure. Relax your body. I need you to relax or it'll only make it worse – thank you."

Despite the anesthetic, Narcissa felt the pain of the much larger needle inserted into her spine. She let out a small yelp of pain, and her grip on Lucius' hand tightened even more, if it were possible. His hand ran over her hair soothingly, and while she appreciated the act, it didn't make the pain of a needle poking out from her back any less severe. She didn't cry during the procedure, which took about twenty minutes, though she certainly wanted to. Her right leg was tingling, but the Healer had told her that that was a possibility. She was carefully rolled onto her back.

"We'll have your results in a few minutes," William told her as the other Healers left the room with the sample. "Lie here, just like this, until we get back." Narcissa nodded and watched him leave. Lucius sat down on the edge of the bed when he was gone.

"Are you still in pain?" he asked gently.

"It's more like discomfort," she responded. She attempted to give him a small smile. "Thank you for being here with me. I didn't mean to steal you from your work…"

Lucius chuckled. "It's quite alright," he replied. "You're more important than a mess of paperwork…" They smiled at each other and, if Narcissa had wanted to injure herself, she would have sat up to kiss him again. She was hoping that he might take the initiative and lean down to kiss her, and for a moment, it looked like he might; but he opened his mouth instead to say, "I'm sorry about your father."

"Me too," she whispered. "He won't give up so easily, though. I know he's going to prove the Healers wrong. He's too strong."

Whatever Lucius was going to say was drowned out by the Healers bustling back into the room. Narcissa tried to guess the outcome by their expressions; but they were stoic. Her heart skipped a beat. William approached the bed whilst the other set about cleaning up the room.

"You're perfectly healthy, Miss Black," he told her, finally smiling. "I apologize for putting you through all of this, but it's precautionary; I'm sure you understand." She nodded. Even if she didn't agree, she understood. "Now, for the next two hours, I need you to lie on your back. You can do it here at the hospital, but you're welcome to go back to your own house. The reason we need you to lie on your back is so that you won't get ill. There's a chance, if you sit up, that you'll get a terrible headache and possibly feel nauseous. We like to avoid that the best we can."

"If I stay here, will I be allowed to see my father later?" Narcissa asked. She wasn't ill, so that had to work in her favor, didn't it?

William hesitated. Then he shook his head. "I'm sorry," he replied in a low voice, "but I can't allow that. You may not be ill, but you can still contract the infection. Then this procedure would have been wasteful… because you'd need to do it again at some point. I am deeply sorry, Miss Black."

If she hadn't felt the urge to cry before, Narcissa certainly felt it now. She thanked the Healer and he left the room. The rest of the Healers followed shortly after him. Narcissa stared up at the ceiling, blinking back her tears. In the back of her mind, she wondered about her father's chances of survival. The Healers said it wasn't good… what if she didn't get to say goodbye? The thought made her cry and she lifted her free arm over her eyes to hide her tears from Lucius. Sitting up or crying, she was bound to get a headache either way.

_**oooOOOooo**_

The following morning, Narcissa's body still felt a little odd. But she ignored it as she made her way down the corridor towards the room designated for the family. Lucius had brought her home last night, and instructed Dobby to make a nice meal. He'd more or less forced his ex-wife to eat and she had… but not as much as she might have if she were feeling like herself. Shortly after eating, Narcissa had fallen asleep on the couch. When she woke up in the morning, she was in her bed and Lucius was just leaving after spending the night in the guestroom. He had kissed her forehead and then they'd parted ways.

Reaching the room, Narcissa stopped in the doorway, frozen. William Brocklehurst was there. He stopped speaking as she entered and looked up at Narcissa. The blonde's blue eyes went to her sister first (who was always difficult to read), and then to her mother. Druella looked as if the floor had fallen out from beneath her feet. Narcissa looked back at William, who stood up and approached her. She didn't ask any questions; her face asked them for her.

"Miss Black, I'm afraid I have some bad news," William said quietly. "Your father… passed away last night. I'm so sorry." He waited a beat and when Narcissa didn't say anything, he patted her shoulder and then slipped from the room, closing the door behind him.

Narcissa looked at her mother, who was staring at the wall. Then she looked at Bellatrix, who still held an unreadable expression. "I didn't get to say goodbye," Narcissa blurted, on the verge of breaking down. In one swift move, Bellatrix was standing and striding towards her younger sister. The blonde thought she might scream at her, tell her not to cry. However, in a miraculous turn of events, Bellatrix wrapped her arms around Narcissa, holding her close.

"Neither did I," she whispered into her sister's ear.


	10. Chapitre Neuf

**A/N:** thanks to everyone who has reviewed! sorry if i haven't replied to someone's review - not intentional, i swear! i hope you guys like this chapter... maybe i'll get a couple more of you to leave reviews... ;]

**disclaimer:** jk's world ^^

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE NUEF: NEVER LET ME GO<strong>

Narcissa stopped outside of an old building somewhere in the middle of Muggle London. The blue-gray paint was peeling off of the concrete beneath and the door looked as if it might turn into sawdust if one were to knock too hard. It was shabby; definitely not what any of the Blacks had grown up with. Swallowing, Narcissa walked up the steps and knocked tentatively. She glanced over her shoulder, somewhat paranoid that some Muggles would approach her or ask questions or, worse, know that she didn't belong. She took a step back as she heard the lock turning on the door, and braced herself for what was about to come.

When the door opened, Narcissa was surprised to see a petite, brunette young woman staring up at her with a questioning look. She was wearing a man's shirt that, luckily, reached her knees, because Narcissa didn't think she had anything on below the waist.

"Can I help you?" the brunette asked rudely, her face turning dark. She looked Narcissa up and down.

"Is… is Sirius here?" Narcissa replied, hoping to Merlin that he hadn't packed up and moved away already. It had taken her nearly an hour to coax out his address from Regulus, who said that the last time he knew (which was a while ago), Sirius was living here. So there was some possibility that it wasn't the case any longer.

The brunette's face screwed up into a dirty look and she stepped back, her hand still on the doorknob, sizing Narcissa up again. "Who the hell are you?" she snapped, looking as if she were ready for a fight.

"I'm-"

"Narcissa…?!" Sirius appeared behind the brunette, giving his older cousin a curious look. His hands rested on the brunette's hips, who was now giving Narcissa a look that suggested she – a Black! – was the scum of the earth.

"Who the hell is she?" the young woman snapped. "What the hell kind of name is _Narcissa_? What the _fuck_, Sirius?" She spun around to face Sirius. "Are you fucking this blonde bimbo? I swear-"

"No, no, baby!" Sirius said hurriedly, glancing nervously up at Narcissa, who was ready to turn and leave. _Blonde bimbo?_ Who did this Muggle think she was? (And it was completely obvious that it was a Muggle.) "This is… this is my cousin. Give us a few minutes, yeah?"

The brunette glanced over her shoulder at Narcissa, tossed her hair and then slipped by Sirius and disappeared into the townhouse. Sirius watched her leave before turning his full attention back to his cousin, still looking completely baffled. He slipped into some wellies, pulled on a coat and stepped outside into the cold.

"What are you doing here, Narcissa?" Sirius asked coldly, folding his arms over his chest.

"I don't exactly want to be here," Narcissa replied coolly, glancing at their surroundings again. "But I need… I need a favour from you."

Sirius laughed. "Right," he said sarcastically, "sure you do."

"Sirius-"

"What? What could _you_ possibly want from _me_?" Sirius finally asked.

Narcissa hesitated. "I don't know if you've heard, but… my father passed away-"

"I may have read something in the Prophet," Sirius said after a slight pause, his voice softening. There was another beat of silence. "I'm sorry, by the way. I know you two were close. He was a good man."

Narcissa nodded. "Thank you," she said sincerely. She hesitated again. "You know… he was always fond of you. Even after everything that happened…"

Sirius shifted his weight and readjusted his arms. "He was a better father to me than my own." They were both silent and the wind whistled in Narcissa's ear. She shivered slightly. "What was it that you needed?"

Narcissa took a deep breath. She could feel her heart beginning to beat faster, was wondering if she'd be able to get the words out at all. She wished she had something in her hands that she could twist or rip or squeeze; something to ease her anxiety. "I need you… I need you to tell… Andromeda," Narcissa eventually replied, weakly uttering her sister's name.

Again, only the wind could be heard as the cousins stood outside on this cold day, staring at one another.

"I'm sure she's seen the Prophet as well-"

"No," Narcissa said sharply, cutting Sirius off. "She needs to know the time, the date, the place… for the funeral. Even if she won't go," she added before Sirius could say anything. "He was still her father. He never stopped loving her… Please, can you give this to her?" Reaching into her pocket, Narcissa fished out a torn piece of parchment and held it out to Sirius. He stared at the offering before hesitantly reaching for it, and taking it gently from his cousin's grasp.

"I'll give it to her, but I can't promise anything."

Narcissa nodded, her mouth and throat dry. She wanted to tell Sirius that it was okay, because she had stopped believing in promises a long time ago.

_**oooOOOooo**_

Despite the sad occasion, the weather on the day of Cygnus' funeral was, in one word, beautiful. It seemed that March had relented its fierce grip and would allow spring to come once again. Everything was still dead, of course, but the thin layer of snow was melting quickly (and becoming mud, which was worse, especially for a woman in heels), and the sun warmed Narcissa's skin. As glad as she was for the change of weather, she also felt guilty. Guilty that she was enjoying it. Guilty because it was such a beautiful day for something so terrible as a funeral. Guilty… because life went on without her father in it.

It was a quiet, small funeral. Family and close friends only. Narcissa stood in front of the crowd next to her mother and her sister as the speaker said kind words about Cygnus Black III. Somewhere among those people was Lucius, with his father; though Abraxas Malfoy may have destroyed their marriage, he and Cygnus had been good friends. (Even if they hadn't, it still would have been rude for Lucius and his father not to show up.)

Beside her, Druella was crying. Narcissa only knew because of how often her mother was reaching up to her face, presumably dabbing her eyes. Bellatrix, on her other side, was stoic, motionless. She didn't move a muscle. She didn't cry. She just stared across the graveyard and Narcissa wondered what she was thinking.

After the speaker was done, everyone lined up to sprinkle dirt or drop a flower on top of the casket. Druella, Bellatrix and Narcissa went last. Narcissa paused the longest of anyone who had come to the funeral, gripping the stem of the (de-thorned) rose in her hand. When she dropped this flower and walked away, the gravediggers would begin their work. Cygnus would be buried in the earth. He would be unreachable, untouchable. He would be gone. Narcissa found it difficult to breathe after a few moments and she struggled to keep her composure. A familiar hand entwined with her fingers; she didn't even look at him. After she had calmed down, Narcissa let the flower fall gracefully from her hand and on to the top of the casket. She looked at Lucius now, who led her away.

No words had to be said as they walked slowly away from the grave plot. The funeral party had gathered outside of the graveyard's gates. There was to be a reception at the Blacks' mansion, though Narcissa didn't understand how people could eat. She hadn't eaten in about two days, and she still wasn't hungry. She'd been drinking a lot of tea, however, and she reasoned that that was what warded off her hunger. They stopped a few yards away from the entrance and turned towards each other. Lucius brushed back the hair from her face.

"Will you be going to the reception?" Narcissa asked quietly.

"I've taken the day off from work," Lucius replied, which was his answer for 'yes'. "My father, however… won't be there. Will your mother mind too much?"

"I doubt she'll even notice." Narcissa swallowed. "Promise you'll stay with me?"

"I promise."

She may have not believed in promises, but that didn't stop him from making them.

As they were about to meet the group, Narcissa glanced back at her father's grave plot. She had expected to see the gravediggers hard at work, but instead she saw three people – a woman, a man and a child. She knew exactly who they were and she wanted nothing more than to run up to Andromeda and hold her and never let her go. But the pain that her middle sister had caused all those years ago came barreling towards Narcissa. She had to look away to keep herself from being hit. Lucius seemed to understand and he strode purposefully out of the graveyard, Narcissa's slim hand gripping his tightly.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"I'm exhausted," Narcissa murmured as she stepped into her house, Lucius following close behind her.

"It's been a long day," he agreed. Narcissa turned to face him as she shrugged off her coat. He took it from her and hung it on the rack, though he didn't take off his own. A sheepish look reached Lucius' face. "I should probably go…"

"Stay with me," Narcissa replied right away, stepping towards him. Her blue eyes pleaded with him. "Please. I don't want to be alone."

"Cissa…"

She knew that tone. The half-scolding, half-timid tone. When they were married (even before), she was always able to get her way, even if Lucius protested it in the beginning. She could use those same techniques, but would it work? They weren't married anymore. They weren't even seeing each other. He was engaged. If he stayed the night… oh, the rumors that would ensue.

"Lucius," Narcissa spoke gently, stepping towards him. Their gaze didn't break. "Do you _want_ to stay?"

"You know the answer," he replied softly, reaching up to cup her neck in one hand, his thumb rubbing small circles behind her ear.

"Then _stay_," she whispered. "Tell Jemima you'd been called away to a meeting…" She didn't mean a meeting for his job. Though Lucius had tried to keep it hidden from her when they were engaged, Narcissa had discovered the tattoo on his left arm one evening when she was staying at the manor. Needless to say, it had ruined any romance that had been about to occur as they began to argue about it.

Narcissa hadn't wanted Lucius to join the Dark Lord's ranks, just like she hadn't wanted her sister to. She had already lost one sibling, she couldn't face the world if the same were to happen with the other. Lucius made things a little easier, however, like he'd done since the day Narcissa had told him about Andromeda. Bellatrix had already been a Death Eater by the time all of this occurred, but the youngest Black didn't find out until after Andromeda left. Her sister's rage towards Muggles and Mudbloods had flared in the months that followed. Lucius graduated from Hogwarts that year and took an internship at the Ministry when Narcissa went back to school in autumn. A year later, he was a Ministry of Magic employee and they were engaged. Narcissa should have noticed the signs that Lucius was involved with some sort of organization, but she was so busy focusing on the wedding plans that her fiance's initiation into the Death Eaters went straight over her head. She found out a few months later, and nearly called off the wedding. When Lucius claimed that he hadn't told her because he'd been "trying to protect" her, she stormed out of Malfoy Manor and refused to see him for about two weeks. They reconciled, however, though Narcissa always gave him The Look (which was a combination of hatred and warning and 'I won't ever forgive you', mixed with worry and slight guilt) whenever Lucius said he had to "go out".

There was silence all around them. Lucius seemed to be weighing his options and Narcissa was willing him to say yes, that he would stay. When he opened his mouth to finally speak, Narcissa acted on instinct. She leaned forward and pressed her mouth to his, fearing that his answer was no and instead of hearing the word, she decided to kiss it away. But the kiss didn't stop. It grew heated and dangerous as they stumbled down towards Narcissa's room. This truly hadn't been her intent, but she wouldn't have ended it for anything.

When the back of her legs hit the bed, Narcissa gripped Lucius for balance. His lips moved to her neck and she craned it to the side to give him better access to the sensitive skin behind her ear. His hands found their way to her backside, where they struggled for just a moment to unclasp the top of Narcissa's dress. She heard the zipper being pulled down a second later and when the cold air hit her back, she shivered.

Neither hesitated as they undressed one another. There was nothing that could stop them now. When Narcissa was down to nothing but her lace thong, Lucius wrapped his arms around her bare middle and carefully laid her down on her bed. He knelt above her, his eyes rediscovering every inch of her body. Then he peeled off his undershirt and positioned himself on top of Narcissa, their bare chests pressing up against one another. Narcissa unraveled her arms from around Lucius' neck as he began to trail kisses along her body. First, his lips traveled to her neck again and then slowly made their way across her visible clavicle. Then he kissed down the middle of her chest, following her breastbones until he tenderly kissed the skin between her breasts. He paused there and looked up at his ex-wife. Narcissa smiled at him and reached down to finger the tips of his blonde hair. She let out a gasp when Lucius lowered his mouth over one of her breasts. Her eyes closed and she felt his lips upon hers once again.

"I love you, Narcissa," Lucius breathed against their kiss.

"I love you, too," she replied, breaking the kiss and staring up at him. Narcissa's eyes searched his face, looking for any sign that Lucius might not agree with what they were doing. She didn't find any traces of it. Everything was so right. _This_ was right. _They_ were right. "Never let me go."

"Never."

Lucius trailed more kisses down the middle of Narcissa's body, along her abdomen, and he stopped when he reached the top of her panties. He sat up slightly, to give himself a better advantage to slip off the lace thong. He dropped it to the floor and lowered himself again, kissing Narcissa from her belly button down.

Only this time, he didn't stop.

Lucius disappeared between her legs.

Narcissa grabbed fistfuls of bedsheets.


	11. Chapter Dix

**A/N:** sooo, after the last chapter, i'm betting this one will be a disappoint. it's really just a filler chapter. quite honestly, i had no idea how to move on after the end of chapter 9, lol. thank you to Az for being a super beta. =] also, i forgot to say that the last chapter was named after florence + the machine's song. this chapter title is named after the song by of monsters & men.

**disclaimer:** how many times do i have to say that i own nothing? xP

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE DIX: LITTLE TALKS<strong>

Narcissa laughed loudly, the sound filling her bedroom. Lucius' hands were resting on her hips, his thumbs rubbing in small circles on the sensitive skin, which sent chills down her spine and was – if it weren't obvious – ticklish. Lucius chuckled as he leaned over her and pressed a tender kiss to the skin behind her ear. When he pulled back, he lingered above her and smiled. Narcissa's laughing subdued and she stared back up at him, her blue eyes twinkling.

"Lucius-"

"Shh." He dropped his head and brushed his lips against hers. Then, he lay down next to her on his back and stared at the ceiling. Narcissa turned her head to study Lucius, before rolling over on her side and propping her head up with her arm. Lucius looked at her.

"What are you thinking?" she asked softly, pulling the bedsheets up to cover her chest.

Lucius reached up to touch her cheek with the back of his hand. "I'm thinking that… I don't want to leave," he started off slowly and Narcissa felt her heart shrink. "I don't want to go home to a house without you… I don't want to marry someone else… I just want to be with you."

"Then be with me," Narcissa urged quietly. She scooted closer to Lucius and leaned across him so their chests were pressed together, but the rest of her body was on the bed. She folded her arms on his chest and rested her chin on her wrist as she stared at Lucius. She pouted.

"It's not that simple, love," Lucius said gently. He fingered the tips of her blonde hair.

"It never is," she agreed solemnly. She remained where she was for a moment before rolling off of Lucius and sitting up. Her arms kept the bedsheets up to cover the front of her and she picked at the material. Her back was left exposed, however, and as Lucius gazed at her, he could see her spine and – vaguely – her ribs.

Lucius sat up as well and moved towards her. "Narcissa-"

"I'm sorry," Narcissa blurted, glancing his way sheepishly. There was silence and she took that as her cue to continue. When Lucius needed further explanation, he never asked her. He always waited patiently until she was ready to talk. "I'm sorry I couldn't – I can't – give you… have… get pregnant. And it's not just about you," she added tightly, trying to swallow down the lump in her throat. "I want children, too."

Again, the silence filled the bedroom. It only took a moment, but Narcissa felt Lucius' hand around her arm. She fought him at first, not wanting to be touched, but he knew better. He knew what she needed and when. Sometimes, she thought he knew better than she did. Narcissa allowed herself to be collected in Lucius' arms, the top of her head tucked comfortably under his chin. He rocked her gently and, within minutes, they had both fallen asleep.

_**oooOOOooo**_

Lucius walked up the stairs in Malfoy Manor, his feet landing heavily on each step. He sighed as he reached the top, utterly exhausted. Cygnus' funeral had been heartbreaking, if only because he knew how difficult the next few months were going to be for Narcissa. It pained him to see her so upset and so lost. She had been so lost as a teenager, and Cygnus had been there to help her along the way. Their relationship was strong; Lucius sometimes thought it was stronger than his own relationship with her.

The events that had transpired after the funeral, however, had certainly elevated Lucius' mood. For a moment, he'd thought it had Narcissa's as well. But their conversation before they'd fallen asleep, once again, tugged at his heart. He had never blamed her, no matter what anyone else said. Even the Healer, with his heavy German accent, had insinuated (gently) that Narcissa's history of eating insecurities (he couldn't say eating disorders because Narcissa visibly winced each time) had caused their infertility and there wasn't much more he could do. That was the day Lucius had told him off and stormed out of the office, gripping his wife's hand so tightly that he thought he might break her bones. That was also the day their marriage had taken a turn for the worse. Narcissa, like so many times before, became depressed and withdrawn (though she wouldn't admit it) and, above all, refused to eat. It was shortly after that that Abraxas demanded a divorce, claiming that Narcissa was purposefully sabotaging their marriage.

Entering the master bedroom, Lucius walked over to the adjacent bathroom. He had just turned on the water and splashed some on his face when he heard a nauseatingly familiar voice.

"Lucius," it said.

He paused, water dripping off of his face and his hands on the edge of the bath vanity supporting his upper body. "Jemima," he answered in a dull voice. Lucius grabbed a towel and dried off his face. He turned to face his fiance, one brow raised in question. "What?"

"Awfully long funeral, wasn't it?" Jemima purred, stepping closer to him.

"It was."

There was silence and she smirked. "Your father came home hours ago," she informed him, looking as if she had the upper hand now.

But Lucius Malfoy was not one to panic. (And if he did, he didn't show it.) "My father didn't have the decency to show his face at the reception," he replied simply. He dropped the face towel onto the vanity counter and went to slip by Jemima. She placed a hand on his chest. He looked down at her, contempt in his eyes.

"You smell like her," Jemima said, a disgusted look creeping onto her pretty features. Her personality may have been ugly, but she was quite the beauty. "That ex-bitch of yours."

"The only bitch I smell," Lucius said in a low, threatening tone, "is _you_." He gave her a small shove and walked into the bedroom, towards his armoire.

"Wouldn't it be a shame if that pretty little face of hers was suddenly disfigured… for life?" Jemima asked tauntingly.

Lucius gritted his teeth and took several deep breaths through his nose. "You'll leave her out of this, Jemima," he said, glancing at the woman over his shoulder. If anything happened to Narcissa, Lucius was sure that he'd kill the vile woman standing behind him. He turned around to face his fiance.

She looked very, very mad. "Then don't bring her into it," Jemima replied. She approached him until she was standing right in front of him.

"Leave her alone," Lucius repeated firmly. "If you've got a problem with me, you come to me. You don't take it out on Narcissa."

Jemima chortled and stood on her toes to kiss the side of Lucius' mouth. "But, love, it isn't you I have a problem with." Lucius' stomach dropped as Jemima kissed him on the lips. He didn't kiss her back.


	12. Chapitre Onze

**A/N:** wow, has it really been over 2 months since my last update? i'm SO sorry everyone. truly sorry. i hope this update this okay... after this, the story will probably will jumping ahead a lot with each new chapter... which means this story will be coming to a close. i'm predicting about 4 or 5 more chapters until it's finished, just a head's up. but it's all subject to change! chapter title is a Sugarland song.

**disclaimer:** same as always.

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE ONZE: ALREADY GONE<strong>

"Oh, she's terribly beautiful," one woman said.

"Quite," replied another.

"She'll have offers by the end of the night," added a third.

"Oh, but don't you know?" the first went on, lowering her voice. "She's already got some-"

Narcissa, overhearing the conversation, rolled her eyes and took a sip of her champagne. It was the end of June and the debutante season had just begun a few weeks ago. One of the featured debutantes that night was Narcissa's distant cousin, a Rosier. The blonde had come with her mother (who was milling about, no doubt gossiping) and Bellatrix (who was sitting opposite her sister with a pout on her face).

"Bella, stop it. It's not so bad," Narcissa said, crossing one leg over the other. She glanced around, her eyes landing on her brunette cousin, before they were back on Bellatrix's face.

"We don't even _know_ her," Bellatrix protested, folding her arms across her chest. "I don't think we've even met her."

Narcissa sighed. "Of course we have. She was at your debutante ball," she reminded her older sister. Bellatrix stared at her baby sister blankly. "She's the one you pushed into the fountain…"

It took a moment, but eventually Bellatrix's face lit up. She looked over at their cousin and then began to laugh. "_That's_ her?" she asked, looking back at her sister, who nodded. "But she was so… gawky and ugly and annoying!"

"It was ten years ago. She was _eight_."

"But even you were remotely tolerable when you were eight."

"Of course I was tolerable – that was the year you put honey in my hair! I wouldn't go near you." Bellatrix grinned wildly and Narcissa faked an unamused expression, uncrossing her legs to gently kick her sister under the table. They were both laughing a moment later and Narcissa forgot about all of their troubles.

"What's so funny?"

Narcissa looked up to see her mother approaching their table, looking between her two daughters. "Do you remember when Bella poured honey all over my hair because she told me that if I went out in the sun, it would help give it natural highlights?" she asked her mother as Druella sat down next to her.

"Oh, Merlin, I remember that," Druella breathed, looking just as terrified as she had all those years ago. She leaned over to kiss Narcissa's head and then fingered her daughter's hair. "Your beautiful hair… I think I cried over it more than you did."

Narcissa chortled. "And An-" She caught herself before the forbidden name tumbled from her tongue. Druella's hand withdrew as if she'd been burned and when Narcissa glanced at Bellatrix, she noticed her older sister's face was frozen in an icy stare. She swallowed. After the honey incident, Andromeda had offered to give some of her hair to Narcissa "to borrow" in case all of hers had to be taken off. "And… it came out eventually," she came back with slowly, looking between her mother and her sister. "I think it made my hair softer, actually…"

There was silence and Druella muttered an "I think you're right, darling" before Bellatrix excused herself. Narcissa collapsed against the back of her seat, very unladylike, and downed the rest of her champagne.

**_oooOOOooo_**

It had been a while since Narcissa had last seen Talia and their visit was certainly overdue. They'd been in contact through letters, however, and Talia was doing well. She and Edmund Greengrass were doing well; they'd been married by a justice of the peace and their witnesses were Talia's brother and Edmund's parents. Because of her affair and the "shame" she'd placed on her family, Talia was disowned by them. In Narcissa's eyes, it was better for her to be disowned in this case than to have her life endangered every single day and to live in fear every single moment. Besides, if she hadn't left her husband and had Edmund's child, who knows what might have happened to the baby. It could have mysteriously died one day.

Reaching Edmund and Talia's home, Narcissa stepped up to the door and knocked. It didn't take long for someone to answer.

"Hello, Edmund," Narcissa said with a bright smile, stepping into the house as she was invited.

"Narcissa, lovely as always," Edmund replied. "How are you?"

"Oh, I'm quite well. How are you, Edmund?"

Edmuna nodded. "Doing well," he replied in his soft voice. He nodded towards a room. "Castalia's in the kitchen."

Narcissa thanked him and headed in the direction he had indicated, from where amazing scents reached her nose. Stepping into the room, Narcissa saw her best friend from the side with a rounded belly, and she couldn't help but to grin. Talia glanced over at her friend and must have thought she was someone else, because she looked over again with a much more excited look on her face this time. She carefully placed the cooking utensil down and approached Narcissa.

"Oh my gosh!" Narcissa said after they'd embraced. She held Talia out at arm's length as if she were a child. "You're so…"

"Fat?"

"Pregnant." Narcissa dragged her blue eyes away from Talia's swollen belly to her face and smiled warmly. She didn't know what to say; no words came to mind. But she did feel the sudden urge to cry, because during none of her pregnancies had she ever made it this far… not even a pebble of a bump. Why?

"I'm due in three months, Cissy," Talia said gently, breaking through Narcissa's thoughts.

Narcissa nodded. "I know. It's flown by, hasn't it?" she commented. "Did you ever find out the gender?"

Grinning, Talia seized her best friend by the hands and pulled her in close. They bent their heads together, foreheads touching, and their eyes were wide. It was like they were teenagers again. "It's a girl!" Talia whispered excitedly. And then she started laughing from sheer giddiness. Narcissa couldn't help but to grin madly. They pulled apart. "Don't tell Edmund. He wants to be surprised."

"Have you thought about names?"

Talia nodded. "We'll talk about them later, okay?" she said, stepping back over to the oven and glancing at the entrance of the kitchen where Edmund had entered.

Narcissa nodded. "What do you need help with?"

**_oooOOOooo_**

It was some time later and the two friends were sitting in the living room, munching on some snacks and going through baby name books (Edmund had gone out) when the front door burst open and two people stumbled into the house. Narcissa and Talia both looked up, startled, as Tristan and Regulus appeared in their view. The boys, who were holding hands, instantly stopped their laughter and their talking. Their hands never unclasped and Narcissa stared at them for a good minute before she felt all eyes on her. She looked from Regulus, who looked down at his feet, to Tristan, who boldly stared back, to Talia, who looked like a frightened doe.

"I thought you said it would be safe after four," Tristan spoke up, the comment directed at his sister. Narcissa looked at him and then back at Talia.

Talia turned to her brother and swallowed. "I did," she replied rightly. She glanced at the clock on the wall. "I didn't realize… I lost track of time. Besides, she's my best friend, Tristan. I shouldn't have to kick her out."

Narcissa blinked. "Excuse me? Is… is my presence an _inconvenience_?"

"Yes," Tristan replied.

"No," Talia said at the same time.

"Regulus?" Narcissa said, turning all of her attention to her cousin, who was still staring at the floor and had not made a sound. He glanced up and looked very comfortable. He looked nervously at Tristan and then Talia and then back to Tristan. "Regulus, look at me." Dutifully, Regulus turned to Narcissa and swallowed. She gestured to their hands, which they were still holding together. "What's going on?" It wasn't that she didn't know what was going on; she knew. But she wanted to hear it from Regulus.

"Why are you forcing him to do this?" Tristan asked.

"You're the one who won't let go of his hand," Narcissa said, fixing Talia's brother with a cool stare.

"We're going out," Regulus blurted out suddenly. He looked pleadingly at his older cousin. "Cissy, please don't tell my mother. She'll… she'll… I can't imagine what she'll do."

She was quiet for a minute. "I don't plan on telling her. But why didn't you tell me?" she asked. "When haven't I been trustworthy? I tell you everything."

"Just like you told me about Rookwood."

Narcissa's heart skipped a beat. "How did you find out about that?"

"Lucius."

"That's completely different, Regulus." She stood up, growing angrier by the second. Angry at Lucius for not being able to keep his mouth shut – who else had he told? Angry at Rookwood for taking advantage of her. Angry at Regulus for being a screw up like his brother. Angry at Talia for being pregnant. Angry at Tristan for being so disrespectful. Angry at Abraxas for ruining her marriage. Angry at Jemima for being a bitch. And angry at herself, for being so weak in every one of the above situations. "Did you know about this?" Narcissa asked now, turning to Talia. She didn't give her friend time to answer, because it was obvious that she did. "And you didn't tell me?"

"Where are you going, Cissy?" Talia called after the blonde.

Narcissa marched towards the front door, trying to keep herself from shaking. "Does it matter? Thank you, very much, for the wonderful afternoon, Talia," she said, trying to be as sincere as possible.

"Narcissa, why do you always run away when things get a little uncomfortable?" Regulus asked. She paused to seriously consider the question, ignoring the fact that it hurt a bit too much. When she didn't offer an answer, he went on. "Are you going to disown me like you did with Andromeda? Turn your back on me? Leave me?"

"She left me."

"Yeah… I'm beginning to see why. Lucius, too."

"Regulus!" Talia scolded, standing up as fast as she could with her round belly. "Completely out of line. Apologize now."

Narcissa, however, was already gone. As she walked down the street, her tears clouded her vision.


	13. Chapter Douze

**A/N:** Hey everyone! Here is another update, I hope you enjoy this one. I am aware that seems to move pretty quickly - the characters kind of took over. ;] It's longer than the other chapters, which most people are usually pretty happy about so I hope you all share the same sentiment. ^^ The chapter title is from The Lumineer's song "Ho Hey", which is very fitting for this chapter, so go give it a listen! Thanks for Az for being a fantastic beta and thanks to everyone, even the unregistered folks, who have left me reviews! It means a lot. xx

**Disclaimer:** Same as before.

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE DOUZE: I BELONG WITH YOU (YOU BELONG WITH ME)<strong>

It had been a few days since the incident at Talia's house. Narcissa kept mostly to herself, needing a few days to process everything. She'd had tea and supper with her mother a few times, but that was the most interaction she had with anyone. If anyone wrote her, she didn't respond. She kept running that day over and over in her head, no matter how badly it hurt. The truth hurt after all, didn't it? And she did tend to run away from it, as Regulus (in a very roundabout way) had pointed out. But it was easier, and no one was ever there to comfort her when the truth came out. She needed someone to be there for her. She needed someone to hold her hand. She needed someone to tell her that it was going to be alright.

As quickly as she could, Narcissa dressed and headed to the Ministry. After going through the appropriate actions, she was on her way to Lucius' office. He may have gone behind her back, but he should at least get a chance to explain himself before she ignored him or screamed at him. Narcissa knocked on his door, which opened a matter of seconds later.

"Hey, Cissa. Come in," Lucius said, giving her a warm smile and stepping aside. Narcissa returned his smile and walked into the office. When she heard the door close, she turned around to face Lucius, her body language completely different from what it was before. Lucius paused, studying her, and then spoke slowly. "Is something the matter?"

She didn't want to accuse him. She didn't want to fight. She wanted to have a discussion. They were adults. Swallowing, Narcissa nodded slowly and took a deep breath. "Regulus told me that you told him about… about Rookwood," she said, her voice a little shaky. She had put that in the past, or so she had thought. She and Lucius had had sex a few times since her father's funeral and she hadn't once felt unsafe. "Is that true?"

Lucius was quiet, as if deciding which fate were worse. "I was worried about you, Narcissa," he replied calmly, looking her right in the eye. "We were on a mission together and the conversation was lacking… I was concerned."

Narcissa nodded. She couldn't be mad at him for that, could she? Yet she didn't know how to feel. What she could feel was a bundle of emotions rising to the top, ready to spill over at any minute. She took a deep breath again. "I understand," she started off, "but… but it's not your job to be concerned. You're not mine, and I'm not yours. You don't get to decide when you're concerned and when you're not concerned. Is that clear?" Now the tangent was starting; so much for a discussion. "What irritates me most is that Regulus knew this _entire time _– he knew that I had been violated. What if, every time I laughed in front of him, he was wondering if it were genuine? Or what if he were wondering if my smiles were forced? What if he-"

"Narcissa, stop. Sweetheart, stop it," Lucius said, stepping up to her and grabbing her face gently between his hands. She looked up at him, her last bit of control leaving her face as a stubborn tear squeezed out of the corner of her eye. "You're going to make yourself crazy. You're the only one who thinks those things, Cissa. I promise you, I never looked at you differently after I found out. Maybe at first, because I wasn't sure how _you _were going to act. But, love, I never thought of you as weaker or violated. If anything, you were – _are _– stronger to me. You're not a victim; you're a survivor, Narcissa."

It wasn't just his words that made her finally cry. It was everything. Everything from the start of the year that was finally catching up with her, that she couldn't run away from any longer. When Lucius tried to wrap his arms around her, Narcissa shoved him away and instead chose to bear her pain alone. She wasn't sure how long she cried for, but when she finally turned to Lucius, he looked a little uncomfortable. He didn't approach her and she didn't approach him.

"Lucius," she said, her voice thick, "I can't do this anymore. It hurts too much. I love you, so much… more than anything… and I still want to be with you. But I _can't_. I can't do this."

There was only silence that came from his side of the room. Narcissa swallowed down the lump in her throat and she turned away from him. Slowly, she headed for the door. Upon reaching it, she grabbed the handle and turned it.

"Narcissa-"

"Please leave her," Narcissa begged, letting go of the handle and spinning around, meeting Lucius in the middle of the room. She looked up at him, tears beginning to form in her eyes again. "Please. I'll do anything. Damn your father-"

"I think he had me under the Imperius Curse, anyway," Lucius whispered before bowing his head to catch her lips with his.

_**oooOOOooo**_

Since their decision to get back together, the couple seemed to be doing well. Lucius liked waking up each morning to see less and less of Jemima's things, and more and more of Narcissa's. He also enjoyed her scent that lingered in the room, even long after she'd left for the day. As for Narcissa, she was glad to be sharing a bed again. She liked not being alone so much; she liked the fact that her life seemed to have a purpose once more. When it came to their divorce, that was the tricky part. Divorces were, obviously, final. There was no undoing them. The paper couldn't be ripped up as if it hadn't happened. The only exception was special circumstances. Lucius did inquire about being under the Imperius curse at the time of the divorce, but there was no proof of it and Abraxas Malfoy would never admit to such a thing, so the only way for their marriage to be legal again was for them to remarry.

Lucius was sat in his study at the manor, going over some final documentation for tomorrow (the day of the wedding), when the door burst open. He looked up and saw Jemima standing there, with a fistful of papers in her hand. Striding up to his desk, she thrust them down in front of him.

"What the hell is this?" Lucius asked, glancing down at them.

"Read them." A small smirk appeared on her face, one that made even Lucius uneasy. "All of my things are gone. I'll be leaving now. See you around, Lucius."

"Goodbye, Jemima," Lucius said, beginning to organize the papers she had thrown at him.

She left the room and he started to read the papers in his hand. From the very beginning, his stomach sank; and by the end, he thought he might be sick. There wasn't much that got to Lucius Malfoy, let alone made him feel as if he needed to vomit. He dropped the papers to his desk and stared down at them, frozen in his chair. That sick, sick girl. How could he have let her into this house? How could he have let her share a bed with him? The papers mocked him from their spot on his desk. Lucius was torn: should he burn them or should he turn them over to authorities? There had to be some sort of consequence for actions such as this. He didn't have much time to think, however, as he heard Narcissa call his name. He shoved the papers into the bottom drawer of his desk and made sure to meet her in the doorway of his study, deciding to forget about this new concern for now. He'd do his best to not let it ruin his night.

"It feels nice to be back," Narcissa said, kissing his cheek.

"It's very nice to _have _you back, I assure you," Lucius replied with a coy smile. He wrapped both arms around her waist, gently pushing her body against his.

Narcissa's arms rested on his chest, though one hand crept up to the crew of his shirt. Her index finger ran along the top of it, and she looked up at him from under her lashes. "Though… I have forgotten a few things," she admitted playfully. "You may need to give me a tour."

Lucius smirked and she knew that he'd fallen right into her palm. "We could start with the bedroom, if you'd like," he suggested.

"I was hoping you'd say that."

_**oooOOOooo**_

The wedding was small; it was nowhere near as grandiose as their first wedding had been. Narcissa's mother, sister and brother-in-law were there. Abraxas Malfoy begrudgingly came along and a few of Lucius' closer friends (Severus Snape, for example) were also in attendance. Lucius had insisted on new wedding rings, but Narcissa had refused. She wanted to wear their original ones, as if their divorce had never happened. As usual, she got her way. Her gown was simple as well. She didn't feel the need to go overboard for this wedding. (After all, this was not the wedding she planned on telling her children and grandchildren about.) After the wedding, the small group returned to the manor for drinks, dinner and dessert. It was a quiet, simple evening, but it was one that was not to be forgotten.

"Congratulations, Cissy," Talia said as she approached her best friend.

They kissed each other on the cheek and when they pulled apart, Narcissa smiled at her. "Thank you," she replied.

"It's so nice to see you two back together," Talia remarked, absently placing a hand on her swollen belly. She looked Narcissa up and down. "You look beautiful, by the way. Simple yet classic and beautiful." There was a pause. "How does it feel to be Mrs. Malfoy again?"

Narcissa laughed. "Fantastic?" she said, not sure what word to pick. She shrugged. "It doesn't feel as though I ever stopped being… her. It just feels as if I went on a very long holiday. Do you know what I mean?"

Talia nodded slowly. "I think so." She glanced around and then stepped closer to Narcissa. "I know it's not any of my business, but I think you should talk to Regulus. He needs you." She nodded in the direction of the dark-haired boy, who was conversing with both Severus and Lucius (and Narcissa hoped they weren't talking about the one thing they all had in common. Not here, not now).

"Is he alright?"

"Just talk to him," Talia urged, giving her friend a small shove in the direction of the three men.

Narcissa stared at her cousin, who seemed like a stranger now, from where she stood. Talia stood directly behind her. The two women stared at the three men for some time before Narcissa received another small push, which set her into motion. She crossed the room, smiling at the few guests who toasted her as she walked by, and stopped when she reached Lucius' side.

"Darling," she said softly, placing a hand on his upper arm. The conversation between the men ceased and Lucius turned his full attention to his wife.

"Yes, pet?"

"Darling, I don't mean to interrupt, but… I need to steal Regulus from you," Narcissa said, glancing at her cousin, who was looking down at the floor. He seemed to flinch when she said his name, but he didn't look up.

Lucius nodded. "That's fine, love." He kissed the side of Narcissa's head.

"Thank you." Turning to the third man in the group, Narcissa added, "Severus, thank you very much for coming tonight. I know it means a great deal to Lucius – and to me. And you seem to be one of the few people who can hold my husband's attention, so you are welcome here anytime." She flashed him a smile before turning away from the two of them and facing Regulus, who reluctantly looked up at her. "Shall we?" She offered her arm.

Regulus took her arm and they headed off to a secluded section of the room, where they could talk in private. "Are you okay?" Narcissa asked as they pulled apart, trying to read her cousin's facial expressions.

"It doesn't matter," Regulus replied, folding his arms over his chest.

"It does to me."

Regulus scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"Do you think I don't care?" Narcissa asked, hurt.

He stared blankly at her, as if it were obvious. "You walked away from me."

"Yes, I did," she admitted. "Maybe I shouldn't have, but I needed time to think. I'm here now, though. Talk to me, please."

The silence lapsed between them for a few minutes. The reception music continued to play and the conversations between the rest of the crowd carried on. Finally, Regulus shook his head. "When I say it doesn't matter, it doesn't," he told her. "Tristan and I, we're not… we… I couldn't disappoint my parents like Sirius. I want to make them proud. Tristan didn't want to be with someone like that, who wasn't willing to be open about our… relationship." He paused and smiled, though Narcissa saw right through it. "Besides, my mother has me set up with that Parkinson girl."

"Poppy?" Narcissa asked, her eyes growing bigger. The Blacks and the Parkinsons hadn't always been on the best terms in the past, so it was a surprise to hear that Aunt Walburga had set her son up with their daughter.

"Is that her name?"

Narcissa laughed. "Yes, you!" She swatted his arm, noting that he wasn't able to hold off his smile any longer. Stepping closer to him, Narcissa threw her arms around his neck suddenly and hugged him closer. "I'm glad you came. I would have been upset if you hadn't."

Regulus hugged her back tightly. "Me too," he agreed quietly.

_**oooOOOooo**_

When the evening was through, and the last guest had left, Lucius and Narcissa retired to their bedroom. There, he gathered her hands in his and kissed her forehead.

"I love you," he whispered.

"I love you, too," she murmured back, as her lips found his in the dark.

Their wedding clothes were in a pile on the floor in a matter of moments, and they tumbled down onto their bed. It was a battle of sheets and arms and legs, and Narcissa laughed in Lucius' ear as his fingers danced across the skin of her hip, tickling her. She met his gaze and smiled, never having felt so sure about anything in her life before. He returned her smile. Narcissa pulled his head down towards hers to kiss him. As she did, Lucius took the occasion to push himself inside of her. Her back arched, her breath caught in her throat and she bit down on Lucius' lower lip.

It couldn't be more right.


	14. Chapitre Treize

**A/N:** Okay, sooo. The last chapter didn't get many reviews compared to how many I've been getting for the last several chapters. I dunno if it's because people didn't like it or you've been busy (I understand that)... but I won't know if you hated it or loved it unless you review. So please review this one. I'm not asking for anything monumental. Thank you to everyone who did reply, though. =] It's very much appreciated. ^^ The name of this title is Beyonce's song, _If I Were A Boy._

**Disclaimer:** Ain't none of it mine, fools! xD

*****TRIGGER WARNING*****  
><em>The following chapter will go a little more in depth about Narcissa's miscarriages. Read if you wish.<em>

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE TREIZE: IF I WERE A BOY<strong>

While a honeymoon would have been ideal, the newlyweds weren't granted one. Lucius had too much work to be done between the Ministry and… well, his extracurricular activity. He'd promised Narcissa, however, that around Christmastime, they would get away. She was looking forward to it. They were married on a Friday, so the weekend was spent making up for lost time anyway. Saturday night, however, they managed to sneak off to Paris for dinner.

"I love it here," Narcissa said as they strolled down a cobblestone alley hand-in-hand."

"The city suits you well," Lucius murmured. "Tres jolie."

"It is a pretty city."

"Not the city."

Narcissa stopped, catching Lucius off guard. They stood in the middle of the quiet, dimly lit alley, arms stretched out with their hands grasping each other's tightly. It astounded her at times just how little it took Lucius to make her feel like the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen. She had often thought that that was something husbands or boyfriends did automatically, as if they were born with the knowledge to do so. But then she'd grown up and seen the real world, and realized just how rare true chivalrousness really was.

"What's the matter?" Lucius asked, stepping towards her.

Narcissa shook her head. "Nothing," she said. She, too, took a step towards her husband. She kissed him on the cheek, catching the side of his mouth. "Everything is perfect." Before Lucius could respond, however, Narcissa closed her lips over his.

The couple was just arriving at the restaurant when Lucius suddenly stopped in his tracks, making an uncomfortable face. He glanced at Narcissa, who placed a soft hand on his abdomen. "What is it?" she asked calmly.

"We have to go," Lucius said at once, standing tall.

"But-" Narcissa stopped and stepped away from her husband. "Oh." Her voice had dropped several octaves, alerting him that she was unamused. She noted the changes in Lucius' demeanor, however, it wouldn't change the way she acted towards him.

"Let's go." A second was not wasted. The couple stormed away from the restaurant and headed towards the international floo-ways.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"Narcissa."

"Abraxas," Narcissa replied coolly, without looking up from reading the article in the _Prophet_ that currently held her attention. She picked up her tea and sipped it, all the while ignoring her father-in-law. She knew it would drive him crazy. He wanted to talk about something, she could sense it; but he didn't want to initiate the conversation. He wanted to her to do it. Behind the paper, she smirked and drank more of her tea.

"Narcissa?" Abraxas Malfoy started again, this time a bit softer and more inviting; and also posed as a question.

Narcissa finally averted her gaze from the article to the older man seated across from her. "Yes, Abraxas?" She folded the paper up and placed it down on the table. Respect had to be earned; she wasn't going to be polite just for the hell of it. (At least not to her father-in-law.)

"Where is Lucius?"

It was Monday morning. Lucius had left Saturday night after being called away by the Dark Lord. Naturally, Narcissa hadn't been pleased; however, she'd still kissed him goodbye and told him she loved him. Just in case. One of these days, though, she told herself, she wasn't going to. Because maybe he would stay home, maybe he wouldn't go. Or maybe that would give him more incentive to get back safely – to receive a welcome home kiss. Narcissa brushed the thoughts aside, trying to focus on her conversation with Abraxas. He knew that Lucius had taken the Dark Mark.

"He… he was called away," Narcissa replied calmly.

"But, there… the _Prophet_-"

"I know." For the first time ever, Narcissa saw fear in Abraxas Malfoy. The mission Lucius had been called away on had been discovered by the Order of the Phoenix and stopped. The Death Eaters they'd caught (which sounded, at least to Narcissa, like some had got away) were taken into custody for questioning and then sentencing. Thus far, there was no word on Lucius – either from himself personally or someone from the Order. She was trying to remain as calm as possible, but her anxiety was rising and the only thing she'd eaten (drunk) since Lucius had left was tea.

"Are you not worried?" Abraxas asked.

Narcissa swallowed. Would she admit defeat? Slowly, she found herself nodding. "Of course I am," she replied quietly, absently playing with her wedding bands. "But there isn't much we can do. You shouldn't worry yourself sick over it. I'm sure he's fine." She sounded confident. It was the mantra she repeated to herself every day, over and over.

"He would be frantic if it were you out there," Abraxas told her. But he waved it off. "What about that sister of yours?"

"Bella? What about her?"

"Have you heard from her?"

"Yes," Narcissa replied. "But she was on a different mission that night, with her husband and his brother. She doesn't know anything about Lucius." Abraxas sat there for a moment longer before grumbling under his breath. He scooted back the chair, got up and stalked out of the room, still mumbling to himself. Narcissa watched him leave before her eyes fell again to the article mocking her from below.

_**oooOOOooo**_

There was blood and Narcissa cussed under her breath, damning the troubles that came with being a woman whilst trying to keep herself from shaking as she tried to ward off the invading thoughts that the blood signified. It was now Wednesday morning and there was still no word from or about Lucius. Abraxas paced the corridors of the manor at night, muttering to himself, and Narcissa's heart went out to him. She understood how he was feeling, except she showed it differently. One of them had to keep it together. One of them had to remain positive. It had always been her in the past, so why should that change now?

When she had cleaned herself up, Narcissa headed down the corridor. She paused, however, when she passed by a door. She'd walked by it hundreds of times before and she knew what lay behind the heavy door. She placed a hand on it, as if she might be able to feel something through the wood. Her other hand grasped the knob and she turned it, pushing the door open slowly. It creaked as it opened. Narcissa let go and stood in the threshold, staring at the room before her. It was the nursery. The one she'd set up for the first baby… She had surprised Lucius one day when he'd come home from work. With each subsequent pregnancy, she had added something new to the room. She told herself it was so that the new baby wouldn't feel as if they had received recycled things. But, really, it was so she wouldn't have to think about the previous baby.

Narcissa closed the door to the nursery. She didn't want Abraxas stumbling in on her. She stepped further into the room, crossing over to the rocking chair. On the seat was a teddy bear. It was the first thing she'd bought. It was a muggle tradition, she knew, but she had seen it in the shop and had fallen in love with the stupid stuffed thing. Scooping it up, Narcissa hugged the bear to her chest. Next, she moved towards the beautiful crib that she couldn't do without. It was as clean as ever; the house elves must still have had instructions to keep the room tidy. She ran her index finger across the edge of the crib, until it hit the blanket that was draped over the middle. With the same hand, Narcissa picked up the edge of the blanket. It was light purple and very soft. A little girl; they were supposed to have a daughter. But then she, too, was taken away.

Walking over to the bay window, Narcissa looked down at the three rosebushes she had planted for each miscarriage. A lump rose in her throat and she dropped her chin onto the top of the teddy bear's head. Her blonde hair fell forward and her blue eyes stayed glued to the rosebushes, even as they welled with tears and she cried for the loss of her babies.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"Cissa," said a voice, interrupting her sleep. A familiar hand clasped onto her shoulder and shook her gently. "Cissa."

She was awake; she was just disorientated and she had yet to open her eyes. "Lucius," Narcissa said, finally lifting her eyelids and rolling onto her back, holding the teddy bear that she'd taken from the nursery tightly to her chest. It was dark in the room, though it couldn't be very late at night; she had only lain down around one in the afternoon. She stared up at her husband, feeling as though she should be more excited that he was home – alive and well – but she couldn't bring herself to move.

Lucius perched on the side of the bed. He reached out to brush Narcissa's hair from her face and then he took her hand in his own. "I just wanted you to know that I'm home now," he said softly.

"You were gone so long." Her voice was accusing.

Lucius looked hurt, but it passed quickly. His thumb gently rubbed the back of her hand. "I know," he said. "We can talk about it tomorrow. I'll let you sleep now." Lucius made an effort to leave, but Narcissa grabbed his hand tightly and tugged on it.

"Where are you going?" she asked, finally sitting up, wincing slightly at the cramps.

Lucius stared at her, and she stared back. She didn't let go of his hand. "Narcissa, I need to eat something, and there's a bottle of Firewhisky I've got to break into…"

"I needed you," Narcissa blurted out, her voice catching. "I needed you and you weren't there." There was silence and Lucius stared sadly at his wife. She knew he felt guilty, and that he didn't have anything to say. She could feel her eyes fill with fresh tears. "I need you _now_."

"Okay." And just like that, Lucius was beside her in their bed. He gathered his wife in his arms. Narcissa molded herself into the usual position: head tucked under Lucius' chin, arms and hands between their chests (one hand usually grabbed at his shirt), and she fit the rest of herself however she could. Whatever made her the smallest; made it seem like she needed protection. Lucius leaned back to kiss her head. "I'm sorry I wasn't here," he whispered. "I am now. I'm so sorry, Cissa."

Turning her face into his, Narcissa breathed him in. When she exhaled, she couldn't help the tears that fell.


	15. Chapitre Quatorze

**A/N:** Okie dokes, here is the next chapter... sorry it took a while to get up! I kept rewriting it because it was never good enough for me. I hope you all like this one - as a spoiler, you find out what is in those letters that Jemima gave Lucius... Please be so kind as to review. It would mean a lot. As a heads up, I reckon there's only another 1 or 2 chapters left until it's over. =X

Chapter title is from the song "Coming Down" by Five Finger Death Punch. Gotta love me some heavy metal. ;]

Also, shameless plugging/advertising... I've started a new Lucissa, based on the time when Narcissa is in Hogwarts. It's called _Poison & Wine_ - go check it out? =]

**Disclaimer:** Not mine!

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><p><strong>CHAPITRE QUATORZE: COMING DOWN<strong>

Narcissa rolled over on her side, struggling to keep her eyes closed. She was awake, but she didn't want to be. She sensed that it was fairly early in the morning – far earlier than she was used to getting up – and she willed herself to go back to sleep. Lucius was up, she knew that. He hadn't woken her, but she could hear the newspaper rustling and she could smell tea. She just wanted to fall asleep for another hour or so, however that didn't seem likely. Sighing heavily, Narcissa rolled onto her back and opened her eyes, staring at the ceiling.

"Am I keeping you up?" Lucius' voice drawled from his side of the bed.

Narcissa turned her head to look at him. "No," she said. "I would tell you if you were. I just can't sleep."

Lucius nodded slowly. "You didn't sleep very well last night," he responded.

Sitting up, Narcissa scooted towards her husband, who promptly wrapped an arm around her. She slumped against his side, resting her head on his shoulder. Her foot absently rubbed up and down the length of his shin. "Did I keep you up?" she asked softly as she stared at the newspaper in front of them.

There was a moment of silence and she pulled her head back to look at Lucius, noticing how tired he looked. "I needed to know you were going to be alright," he finally said. They stared at each other for a few seconds before Lucius broke their gaze. He reached for his tea on the nightstand and took a sip, then offered it to Narcissa. "Some tea, love?"

"Please." She took the cup from him and took a sip, letting the warm liquid wash down her throat. It felt so relaxing and refreshing. She took another sip before handing the cup back to Lucius, who then placed it back on the nightstand. "I'm sorry, Lucius," Narcissa said suddenly.

He looked at her, perplexed. "What for?"

"For acting the way I did last night," she replied slowly. She hadn't rehearsed what she was going to say. It was just coming out. This was new to her, like the office visit not too long ago. Unplanned. "I'm so grateful that you're okay. I was going out of my mind, thinking that you weren't going to come home – and I had your father breathing down my neck on top of that. I was upset about… and it was all I could think of. I wanted you to be here so badly. Then you were, but I was mad. I was mad at you. For being gone for so long, for becoming a Death Eater in the first place… for all of it. It wasn't fair to you," she finally said, her voice softening as it had grown quite strong during her short monologue. "I'm glad you're home and that you're safe. And I'm sorry."

Lucius was silent for a while. Narcissa didn't think he was going to respond. She thought that maybe she had pissed him off. She dropped her gaze and turned to look at the paper, wondering if maybe she should just get out of bed. Take a shower and leave for the day. Maybe they needed some space. _Already?_ a little voice asked. Her stomach sank. Maybe they had changed too much in their year apart. Maybe this wasn't going to work out after all.

"Cissa." Narcissa whipped her head around to look up at Lucius, her blue eyes wide. He reached out to tuck her hair behind her ear. "I forgive you. I know it's not easy on you. But… it means a lot more than you probably think to have you at my side through it all."

Narcissa smiled. She didn't know how to reply, so instead she stretched up to kiss Lucius lightly on the mouth.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"Lucius, are you nearly ready?" Narcissa called as she walked down the hallway to her husband's study. Her heels clicked along the floor. When she reached the study, the door was half open and she pushed it open the rest of the way. "Lucius?"

Lucius was seated behind his desk and when he heard his wife's voice, he nearly jumped. He looked up at her with wide eyes and then scrambled to shove some papers into a drawer. Then he stood up and pushed back the chair. "I'm ready."

Narcissa eyed her husband. But he was already walking towards her. When he reached her, Lucius gently held her by the arms and kissed his forehead. "Is everything alright?" she asked when he pulled back.

"Yes, everything is fine," Lucius assured her, giving her an easy smile. He placed a hand on her back and steered her out of the study.

"You seemed to be taking those papers seriously."

There was a moment of silence and Narcissa looked up at her husband. Lucius nodded. "Work," he replied tightly, and she knew he was lying. She wanted to call him out on it, but didn't want to ruin the evening.

"What sort of work?" Narcissa inquired innocently.

"I am not at liberty to discuss it."

There had never been a time when Lucius was refrained from discussing his work. He wasn't an Unspeakable. Besides, Narcissa wouldn't dare repeat anything he told her to anyone. Then again, he could be referring to work for the Dark Lord. In which case she wasn't positive she wanted to know. If Lucius was ever found out, the less she was aware of, the better. Yet she couldn't help but to wonder what was going on and what those papers contained.

"Where is dinner again?" Lucius asked in the silence that lapsed between them as they continued to walk towards the door.

"At my mother's," Narcissa replied, elbowing him gently in the ribs. "Your father was invited, too."

"Is he going?"

Narcissa was about to reply when they turned the corner, entering the foyer, and saw Abraxas standing by the door. He looked sheepish. Narcissa looped an arm through her husband's and looked up at him with a smile. "Yes, he is."

_**oooOOOooo**_

When Lucius returned to work on Monday, Narcissa attempted to occupy herself with a book. However, her mind kept drifting back to the papers that her husband had rushed to hide from her. They were for work, he claimed. She had accepted his reason, despite feeling as though he were bluffing, and had honestly forgotten all about them until Lucius had left for work that morning. He may have taken them with him today, but there was only one way to find out for sure.

Abraxas never bothered her much during the day, so Narcissa didn't worry about bumping into him on her way to the study. Thankfully, it was a safe trip and she closed the door to the study quietly. When she reached the large ornate desk, she took a seat in Lucius' chair and leaned back, wondering where to look first. Leaning forward, Narcissa pulled open the middle drawer on the left side of the desk. She rummaged through the contains of the drawer, but found nothing of interest and so she tried the top drawer of the right side of the desk. Again, there was nothing particularly eye-catching. Reaching down, the blonde yanked open the bottom drawer on the right side. She smiled to herself when she saw a stack of papers haplessly tossed in there. She picked them up carefully and leaned against the back of the chair.

As Narcissa began to scan the papers, she realized that something was wrong. They were letters, but they were between Augustus Rookwood and Jemima Selwyn. Her brow furrowed, Narcissa was surprised when she came across her own name mentioned in the letters. She swallowed. _When had these been written?_ There were no dates. A hand went to her mouth and she had to take a moment to stop reading. She put the letters on the desk and stared blankly at them. When her heart had slowed, Narcissa grabbed the letters and started to read again, forcing herself to finish them.

When Lucius returned home from work that evening, Narcissa hadn't moved from the chair in his study. She looked up at him as he stepped into the room, tears pooling in her eyes.

"Cissa-"

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked, her voice cracking.

"What are you-" Lucius stopped and the realization hit him. He was at the front of the desk in a flash and snatched up the letters. "No, Cissa… _why?_ Why would you go looking for these? You should have left it alone!" His voice was loud now, angry. But he wasn't upset with her; he was angry with everyone but Narcissa… including himself.

"Why are you yelling at me?" She stood up and the tears came down.

"I'm not-" Again, he broke off. He took several deep breaths. "Narcissa, you had no right to search through my desk. These are private matters."

"Private matters that involve _me_!" she shrieked. She started to walk around the desk."You didn't think I deserved to know? After all, it happened to _me_, not you. I was the one Rookwood raped – and that bloody whore helped him! She gave him the idea – she planted it in his mind." Narcissa laughed bitterly. "I really loved the bit where she expressed how badly she wanted me to get pregnant – because then I would have been forced into a marriage with Rookwood. I reckon it's a good thing after all that I can't have children."

"You don't know-"

"_Don't change the subject!_" she hollered.

Silence fell between husband and wife. Narcissa's eyes had dried because she was too angry to cry. Lucius clutched the letters in his fist. He spoke first, in a quiet voice.

"I was trying to protect you, Narcissa. I didn't want him to break you."

"Too late; I'm already broken, Lucius," she replied, her voice void of any emotion. "The damage is done. There is nothing you can do now."

"I can turn them in."

"No." Narcissa shook her head. She wasn't willing to fight them. The only proof that the rape had happened – and it wasn't just a conspiracy – would be her memory. She wasn't going to hand that over to the Ministry. She didn't wish for anyone else to witness what had happened.

"Is there anything I can do?" Lucius asked, stepping towards his wife and reaching out to touch her face.

Narcissa turned her head away from him. "Get rid of them." She brushed by him and exited the study, heading upstairs to take a long bath.


	16. Chapitre Quinze

**A/N:** Hey all! So sorry it's taken so long for an update. I just want to thank EVERYONE for their continued support and kind reviews and for sticking with me through the years whilst I finish off this fic. It means sooooo much! I think there will be 2 chapters left, but we shall see. =]

Chapter title is from the song "Crawl" by Superchick.

Thank you, Az, for being my awesome beta.

Also, a special thanks to NimbusCentaur, who has been there for me more than she probably realizes.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine okaaayyy?!

* * *

><p><strong>CHAPITRE QUINZE: CRAWL<strong>

Narcissa's back was pressed against the bathtub, and she was submerged up to her shoulders under the hot bathwater. There were bubbles that floated on the top of the water, filling the whole of the tub. Bored, Narcissa blew at them occasionally or reached up with a soapy hand to pinch the bubbles between her index finger and thumb. The bubbles, of course, disappeared almost instantly when she did that, unless they clung to the ones already on her hand. Perched on the side of the tub was a glass of dark red wine. Usually, she preferred white or pink wine, but lately she'd been drinking the darkest red wine she could get her hands on.

There came a knock on the door, which Narcissa didn't respond to. A few seconds later, the door opened slowly and Lucius appeared in her view. He stepped into the master bath and closed the door before approaching the bathtub. He took a seat on the edge and reached out to touch the back of his hand to his wife's cheek.

"How long have you been in here?" he asked, noting that her skin was very warm to the touch.

Narcissa shrugged, making some of the water splash. She extended a leg up to turn the hot water handle with her toes, and more water joined the already high level in the tub. She turned it off, and then back on. She did this a few more times, staring at the faucet rather than her husband.

"Are you only getting home from work now?" she finally asked, glancing his way. She dropped her leg back into the water.

"Yes," Lucius replied. There was a beat of silence before he spoke again. "I was hoping you would be ready by now—or close to it."

The blonde witch's head snapped around and she gave her husband a quizzical look. "Ready?" she repeated. "What for?"

Lucius stared at her blankly, and Narcissa knew instantly that a serious communication error had occurred. "This is your way of being clever, isn't it?" he asked and she sensed that he didn't want an answer. When she remained silent, Lucius let out an exasperated breath. "Cissa… we're having guests over tonight. Don't you remember? You don't remember. You invited Talia and Edmund over. Your sister and Rodolphus are coming as well."

"Oh." Her face fell as she struggled to recall when exactly she had invited her best friend over to the manor. "I suppose I've just been… preoccupied."

"You have been depressed." The statement stung. Narcissa wanted to give her husband the most lethal look, but she couldn't muster one. Besides, he was correct. There wasn't any sense in arguing with Lucius when he was right—especially when he _knew _he was right. Lucius stood up and offered a hand to his wife. "Let's get you out of there, shall we? You're getting flushed."

With a frown, Narcissa raised an arm out of the water and grabbed her husband's hand. He pulled her up, giving her naked body a quick look before he reached for a towel and handed it to her.

"Pig," Narcissa said with a small smirk as she took the towel. He chuckled. After wrapping the towel around her shoulders, she stepped out of the tub and onto the bathmat, still grasping Lucius's hand. He kissed her forehead. "It's _freezing_!" Narcissa began to shiver as she stood in the bathroom, wishing to either get back in the hot water or bury herself in the covers of their bed.

"Start getting ready and you'll warm up."

She flashed her husband a look of annoyance. Lucius led her through the door and into their master bedroom. Narcissa gave the bed a wistful look, but continued to follow her husband towards the large walk-in closet that they shared. "Are we going to be outside tonight?" she asked.

Lucius glanced at her and released her hand. "If you would like to be," he said, watching as his wife went about searching through her clothes. "Personally, I think it would be nice. It _is _the end of the summer."

"I suppose that would be fine, if it's not too humid."

"It's cooling off," Lucius assured her with a small smile.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"Bloody hell, she's fat!"

"Bella!" Narcissa whispered sharply, elbowing her sister in the side. She gave her older sister a warning look, though it didn't faze the other witch at all. "She's _pregnant_. There is a difference."

Bellatrix shrugged. "She's still fat."

"Don't you dare speak to her like that. Do you understand? She is my best friend, and I _will _throw you out of my home if you disrespect her."

"I promise to be on my best behavior," Bellatrix replied with a sly grin. Her best behavior wasn't that good.

Narcissa stared at her sister before shaking her head. She set off towards Talia, who was standing with all three men whilst they spoke. Edmund had a hand on the small of her back, rubbing it gently. Hearing the clicking of heels, Talia looked over her shoulder. Her face brightened when she saw Narcissa, and she excused herself from the group of men.

"Cissy!" she exclaimed, meeting her best friend halfway.

"Hi, love," Narcissa replied. They kissed each other's cheek. "How are you? You look well."

Talia nodded, one hand automatically going to her round stomach. "Considering I'm due in only a couple of weeks, I feel excellent," she agreed.

"When is your due date?" Bellatrix asked, coming up to stand beside her sister. Narcissa knew that she wasn't the least bit interested, but she was making an effort and that was all that mattered.

"September fourteenth."

Bellatrix nodded, her dark eyes lowering to linger on Talia's stomach for a moment. "And do you know the gender?"

Talia stepped closer to the two sisters. "Edmund wants to be surprised," she explained to the older witch, as Narcissa already knew the situation. "But it's a girl."

"Oh. No doubt Edmund will be disappointed."

"Bellatrix!" Narcissa said sternly, giving her sister another warning look.

"It's alright, Cissy," Talia said. The blondes looked at one another before Talia turned to Bellatrix again. "Edmund doesn't mind if it's a girl or a boy. He just wants a healthy baby."

Bella's lips went thin as she stared at the younger woman. Her eyes turned cold, and Narcissa wondered why it had to be this way. Why did her sister always have to cause trouble? She couldn't ever let someone be happy. "Well, that's sweet," she said coldly. She looked Talia up and down before turning away. She stalked off towards the men, standing obediently next to her husband.

Talia was quiet.

"Come on," Narcissa urged gently, tugging on Talia's hand. They walked back to the group in silence. Narcissa didn't speak to Bellatrix for the rest of the night.

_**oooOOOooo**_

"Did you have a good evening?" Lucius asked his wife as they slowly made their way up the stairs to the second floor.

Narcissa nodded. She was holding her husband's hand firmly. "Did you?"

"I did." There was a pause before he commented, "You didn't interact much with your sister."

"She was being… _Bella_." Narcissa felt guilty for saying that, but she _was _upset with her sister at the moment. She would recover in a few days and then she would visit Bellatrix, offering a shoulder to cry on should the older witch want it. "Lucius, if I told you I was pregnant with a girl, would you make me… abort her?"

They were at the top of the stairs now, and Lucius stopped. Narcissa stopped as well, staring at her husband.

"Are you pregnant?"

Narcissa's eyes narrowed in confusion. "What? No!"

"I don't—"

"Just answer the question. Please."

The couple stared at one another for a few more seconds, their hands still clasped together. Lucius let out a long sigh. "You _were _pregnant with a girl once… remember?"

"Of course I remember, you arse." She was growing frustrated, and tried to ignore the painful tug in her chest.

Lucius smirked, but it faded quickly. "I reckon I'm confused about the question—"

"I want a baby, Lucius," Narcissa finally snapped. Lucius looked sad as he stared at her. When he offered no response except for squeezing her hand, she continued. "I can't exactly get pregnant by myself!"

Now he laughed. "Cissa… oh, Cissa," Lucius started, shaking his head. He released her hand and stepped closer to her, holding her face gently between his hands. "I love you… but I swear you're going to drive me mad." He kissed her forehead lightly and pulled back to look into her eyes again. He could tell she was frustrated with him. "You haven't let me touch you since you found the letters… It is not possible to _wish _you pregnant."

"You are infuriating!" Narcissa protested, feeling as if she had backed herself into a corner. It had been some weeks since she stumbled across the letters between Rookwood and Jemima.

They stared at one another before Lucius finally broke the silence.

"Did you want to… start trying tonight?" he asked in a gentle voice.

Did she want to start trying tonight? No, she wanted to start weeks ago! But she _had _just made a fuss about being pregnant and not being able to do it by herself. However, despite her bratty behavior, she wasn't exactly… _in the mood_.

"I'm tired," she said sheepishly, looking down at her feet.

Lucius squeezed his wife's hand and stepped closer to her. His thumb and forefinger hooked onto her chin and he lifted her head so she was looking at him. "Let me know when you're ready," he told her. Narcissa nodded and they headed to their bedroom for the night.

_**oooOOOooo**_

It was midday and the weather outside was _terrible_. There was a thunderstorm that was pouring down on most of the English countryside. Wiltshire was a mess, especially at the manor. There were puddles all over the place and the grass had drank as much water as it could before it drowned. The peacocks had run for their shelter at the first sound of thunder, which had come a little too late, and now most of them were brown from the belly down. The fountain in the gardens had been turned off, but it didn't matter; from all of the rain, it was overflowing. There was a blanket of water on the pathway that was at least two inches deep.

Narcissa and Lucius had just arrived home from the hospital, where they had been visiting Talia. She had finally given birth to her blue-eyed baby girl eight days late, on September twenty-second. She was called Daphne. Narcissa had the honor of being the girl's godmother, whilst Talia's brother was her godfather. Talia and Edmund couldn't have been happier.

Narcissa envied them. They both looked so happy to be new parents, to finally have their child—_to finally start a family_.

"Hopefully we won't be too far behind," Narcissa found herself saying aloud. When she realized what she had said, she looked at Lucius and wondered what his reaction might be.

He didn't seem bothered, however, and merely arched a brow. "Too far behind for what, dear?" Lucius purred in a calming manner. He was standing patiently, not seeming fazed by their conversation in the least. He was always this way with her.

"Lucius." Narcissa reached for his hand without any hesitation. She didn't utter another word.


End file.
